Welcome to Adventu, your final fantasy rp haven. adventu focuses on both canon and original characters from different worlds and timelines that have all been pulled to the world of zephon: a familiar final fantasy-styled land where all adventurers will fight, explore, and make new personal connections.
at adventu, we believe that colorful story and plots far outweigh the need for a battle system. rp should be about the writing, the fun, and the creativity. you will see that the only system on our site is the encouragement to create amazing adventures with other members. welcome to adventu... how will you arrive?
year 5, quarter 3
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Caius smiled warmly as Yuna would indicate that the idea of her success had brought her some level of relief. Caius didn't know the answer for sure, how could he? But what he did know was that if Yuna was as strong as she was now, and apparently even now didn't even have all the power she did back then, by what she had been telling him... Or something like that anyway... Then there was no doubt in his mind that Yuna had been successful and likely had just been sent here by whatever gods lay in her world to serve a new purpose as Summoner. A new mission. A new goal.
That's how he liked to rationalize why he was here, anyway. The idea that he had some kind of purpose here, even if it wasn't one with any real direction... Gave him some level of comfort. He had seen many people come here from many different worlds, most of them warriors. There had to be a reason, right?
Caius wasn't sure what to think of Yuna's wide smile as he flitted about trying to word his feelings on... That stuff. Had he said something funny? Or perhaps something ridiculous that he should be ashamed of? He stared at her a moment with a puzzled look at the end of his speech, though he did laugh slightly when she agreed that their comrade would not be someone they wanted to meet in battle.
Ain't that the truth.
Yuna told him this wasn't a battle, and he blinked a few times. Was that really what he was coming off as? Approaching everything like a battle? Well, he supposed she probably wasn't wrong... It was always easier to. Even Celes had told him in their last meeting, to treat the dance like sparring. That had helped a little. Not much, but enough.
But it was her last words that confused him. Her last question. It was very forward, very sudden, very abrupt. Caius blinked a few times again, his head cocking in confusion.
"I don't understand the question" He admitted bluntly. The whole concept of love was... Still something he was getting a handle on. He'd read books, he had seen bits and pieces of the idea of love from people like Aera, when confronted with the reality that her love was a monster. But he still didn't understand it. He understood that love was... Something, a strong feeling towards people. He understood that much, he was able to wrap his head around the familial type of love, that had been explained to him and he understood that. Even if he knew little else.
But he had also been told there was two kinds of love. One for family and one for... A specific person, for... Something, or some reason. He knew it was something important, something very personal. So when asked if he was "in love" with Celes, it was pretty clear she was not referring to the former. With that process of elimination complete... All he knew was that she was very much asking him a very personal question.
A personal question he didn't know a single thing about how to answer.
Final Fantasy X
19
YEARS
Female
Tidus
Heterosexual
294 POSTS
Erin
I live for the people of Spira, and would have gladly died for them, but no more!
Yuna blinked slightly, looking across the table at her friend as she tried to judge where she had left any room for confusion. She thought that her question had been fairly straightforward--maybe a little blunt even, though she had tried to soften it. The only thing that she could think of was that Caius was trying to dodge the question. Maybe he was offended that she had asked such a personal question? That hadn’t been Yuna’s intention--she had thought that the conversation had led to this point pretty naturally, but she’d back off if this wasn’t a topic that Caius was ready to think about.
“I’m sorry. It’s just...I have someone like that. Back on Spira.” Yuna glanced down at the table, feeling her cheeks grow a bit hot since she had never really admitted this out loud to someone else before. Only in the small glances that she’d thrown his way when she’d thought that no one was watching. “One of my guardians. He never did anything that was expected of him, and he was always so full of laughter...I wished that I never had to be apart from him.”
A stupid wish. She’d been destined to die at Sin’s hands, and he’d wanted so badly to return to his Zanarkand. Yuna only wished that she knew what had become of Tidus after she’d been transported to Zephon. If she truly had defeated Sin, then what had Tidus decided to do afterward? What had any of her guardians decided to do?
“You don’t have to answer that,” Yuna finally said with a small smile as she looked back up at Caius. “Not to me at least. I just wanted you to think about it, but it was personal. My apologies.”
Caius blinked a few times, clearly confused by her answer. It took him a few moments, but after her apologies he would understand that she had taken the mistaken impression that she had offended him. He shook his head. "No, no, I think you misunderstood" He corrected her quickly, wanting to get that out of the way so she knew straight off he didn't hold any ill feelings over her words. "I..."
He let out a sigh, running a hand through his hair as he tried to find the words for what he was to say next. "I... Don't really... Understand" He admitted, trying to convey that he meant the statement quite literally. He bit his lip. He felt so stupid, so foolish. How couldn't he grasp something that, by her explanation, was clearly something normal? Even in her world, and seeing as Celes seemed to know what it was too, something in hers. Odds were it was a normal thing, and he just... Missed out.
"I told you before that I've been on my own since I was a kid. I spent all my time just... Surviving, until I came here. And when I came here, I just... Did more fighting. Did more trying to help people. Because that's all I know. I know... Some things about the concept of love. I know it's related to strong feelings and there's different kinds. A very general, familial kind, which I can understand. But it's the other one, and I know it's the one you're referring to... That I don't. I didn't have... A chance to love, or to learn much about it. I've learned more about the concept in Serentestra than I ever did growing up. But I still don't... Understand all of it. I know it's what you're referring to, otherwise you wouldn't ask since I know familial sort of love isn't a big deal in comparison or worth pointing out. But... I don't understand much about it."
He shook his head, and laughed slightly. A disdained sort of laugh. "Sorry. This must sound stupid to you. Not knowing a damn thing about something that I can tell by the people I've encountered, is something really simple. But I don't. And not for a lack of trying. I know that it's an important part of social culture, and yet... I can't wrap my head around it. I was never taught to. Never had a chance to experience it."
Even if he did love Celes, would he even know? What feelings were even associated with that? How was he supposed to know?
Final Fantasy X
19
YEARS
Female
Tidus
Heterosexual
294 POSTS
Erin
I live for the people of Spira, and would have gladly died for them, but no more!
Yuna was prepared to change the subject when Caius cut in and explained that he genuinely didn’t know what she was talking about. “Oh.” Yuna blinked at him without comprehension for a moment before she finally sat up straighter as realization hit her.
“Oh! Really?” The question popped out before she could censor herself, but she regretted it as Caius sheepishly explained that he’d never really had the chance to experience romantic love before. He’d told her before what life had been like back in his world after Ardyn had spread the starscourge, so she mentally berated herself for not remembering that he’d mostly lived alone in a ruined world. Of course there were some societal things that had never been explained to him. That was only to be expected, so she shook her head earnestly when he started apologizing.
“No, don’t worry about it. I’m only sorry for the misunderstanding.” She gave him a slight smile in her own apology. “It’s not stupid at all. Especially if you never grew up with fairy tales of finding true love, or the like. I think those are pretty common in kids' stories.” And unrealistic, but she wasn’t going to spend time criticizing stories meant for children. They were beautiful anyway, at least in their own right.
“You’re right, there’s a lot of different kinds of love. Familial--like you mentioned--and what you feel towards your friends. Then there’s romantic love.” Yuna’s cheeks reddened slightly as she wondered how best to explain this. She was far from an expert, as her only experience had been the crush that she’d had on the cheerful blonde teenager she’d picked up as a guardian. Her time with Tidus had been brief, but she would try her best to lay it out.
"It’s really hard to explain honestly. I think it might be a little different for everyone. But it feels like you want to spend everyday with that person. Like they’re the first person you want to see in the morning and the last one you want to talk to before you go to sleep. And you’d do anything to make them happy.”
Yuna wasn’t quite sure where to look as she adjusted her hands in her lap, but she made herself meet Caius’ eyes anyway. “That’s why I asked. Just from a few things you said. But there’s no real rush to decide if you do or not. Relationships can really change when you tell someone you love them, so you don't want to do it lightly.”
At least on the inside. On the surface, she and Tidus had pretended for the rest of her guardians that nothing had happened, but she didn’t really want to think about that too hard. Picturing his face was painful, and this wasn’t about them anyway. It was about Caius and Celes.
He supposed he wasn't surprised when Yuna explained that while it was a pretty typical thing, how he had grown up had just kept him from really understanding it. She brought up that the theme was pretty common in children's stories. He had read a few stories since coming here, though while he had been able to figure out some aspects of the subject, he still had some gaps in his knowledge. He listened as Yuna would bring up that indeed, there were several different kinds. Including the romantic love. The way she talked about it confirmed what she said about having experienced it before with someone from her own world. If he was that important to her, then he hoped that one day they would be reunited. He would want to be reunited with Celes as well, with how much he cared for her, should they be separated.
Her explanation made sense. He considered a moment, though, if this indeed did apply to him for Celes. Would he spend everyday with Celes if he could?
Yes. He would. He hadn't considered that before, but when faced with the question of if he would, then yes. He knew right away he would.
Were they the first person he'd want to see, and the last he'd want to see before bed? Yes. She was the one he could trust in most, the person he was most comfortable around and valued most. And whose happiness he valued most.
Would he do anything to make her happy?
Without hesitation.
Then it hit him.
The Masquerade.
He'd told her, hadn't he? That he didn't care about doing the dance and all that if it meant she was happy. Yuna's insistence that relationships can change when someone told another they loved them made him frown for a moment. Suddenly, it started to make a whole lot of sense. Celes suddenly getting upset and storming off. The fact she'd clearly been avoiding him since. He remembered their previous talks, and how she seemed to abhor the topics of dating, or love. That she was a soldier, a warrior, not a "lovestruck twit" as she called it. He'd tipped her off to the possibility, hadn't he?
Was he truly lesser for feeling that way about her? Any less of a warrior? He didn't think it did, seeing as he sure as hell didn't think it made Yuna any less for her clear infatuation with that boy from her world. She'd still probably kill him if she fought him seriously.
But he supposed it didn't matter. Her reaction at the Masquerade, well... That told him what needed to be done. He let out a resigned sigh as he looked to Yuna again. Nodding his head, he regarded her with a sad smile.
"I don't know for sure. But... What I do know is that regardless of how I feel, Celes abhors that sort of thing. How I feel would never be reciprocated, and either way, bringing it up when she seems to hate it so, would only be an inconvenience to her. Which is the last thing I want" He spoke softly. He placed a hand to his chest for a moment. He didn't know why, but it hurt. His chest hurt like hell. But nothing seemed wrong with him. He didn't know why. What he did know, was that deep down he did want to tell her the truth. And having to keep that from her, when he had always been honest before... It felt wrong. To have to hold back what he felt about her for fear of only hurting her, making himself an inconvenience and a distraction, or worse, an unnecessary subject of ire for the person he cherished most... It hurt. It hurt greatly. But it needed to be done.
But if he knew it needed to be done, why the urge to burst into tears? Why did he feel himself getting emotional, his senses overwhelmed with sorrow? He was doing the right thing, right? He was doing what was best if it meant keeping his promise to himself to make her happy. And her being happy made him happy. He'd known that since the Masquerade when he saw that smile on her face.
Then why did the right thing hurt so much?
He did his best to push his thoughts aside as he continued. Keeping his smile best he could.
"I've never lied to Celes. I've never been dishonest with her, or kept secrets. But..." He trailed off, and his smile quivered for a moment, but he managed to keep it, even as his eyes clearly showed that sadness. "... If I do find I feel that way... Then I guess that's one secret I'm taking to my grave. If I do love her, then the best thing I can do is make sure she can continue to look at our journey ahead with a smile on her face. Without me providing pain she doesn't want or need."
Final Fantasy X
19
YEARS
Female
Tidus
Heterosexual
294 POSTS
Erin
I live for the people of Spira, and would have gladly died for them, but no more!
Caius looked a bit struck at her words, and then he was quiet for a moment as if he were mulling them over. When he finally spoke again, something in Yuna’s chest ached for him.
“Regardless of how I feel, Celes abhors that sort of thing. How I feel would never be reciprocated.”
“Then I guess that's one secret I'm taking to my grave.”
“Caius…” Yuna’s heart went out to her friend, especially with the sad smile he gave her. Her composure finally broke when he touched at his chest looking pained, and Yuna reached across the table to grasp both of his calloused hands in hers.
“You’re a good man,” she said with her own sad smile. “And Celes is beyond lucky to have someone who would put her wants and needs far above their own.” Something in Yuna wanted to protest and tell him that there had to be another way, but he knew Celes better than she did. If the co-founder of the Dragonblades felt that way about romance, then Caius would know that better than anyone. The blonde general was an intimidating woman, and while Yuna wasn’t sure how anyone could ever abhor love in general, perhaps she’d had a bad experience with relationships. It wasn’t really her place to ask. Not unless Celes brought it up first, which Yuna rather hoped that she would. Maybe some girl-time was what Celes needed to address the root of the issue.
Releasing his hands with a final reassuring squeeze, Yuna sat back in her chair, a little embarrassed at the faint burning sensation behind her eyes. It wasn’t her problem, after all, but she still felt so bad for her friend. Maybe it was how sad he’d looked once he’d finally taken everything in.
“I’m sorry. I really ruined the mood, didn’t I?” She asked with a faint smile.
It hurt. Caius couldn't lie about that. While he didn't know all of the answers behind all of it, nor did he claim to now know everything about love. But he did know it hurt greatly. But what could he do about it? Celes was Celes. He didn't expect her to change her mind on the subject, nor did he intend to demand an answer about why she was like that. Something had made her like that, and he wouldn't try to force her to change either. If he did love her, he loved her for who she was. That was the front and shut of it. And the only person who could decide who she was, was Celes.
Yuna took his hands, which tipped him off that he must look the part of a wreck. He managed a faint, but sad smile in thanks, as he listened to what she had to say. Celes was lucky, was she? He didn't know about that, but if having someone that put their wants and needs above their own was a good thing for her, he would play the part. He had talked so much about wanting her to be happy, and had admitted that he would do anything to achieve that. He had said she deserved better, himself. Those were not empty desires to be only spoken of through words. If he felt that way, he knew that he should make it happen himself, wherever possible.
He didn't really consider the possibility that one day he might feel that way for someone else. That would be something he would need to discover as he went along.
Yuna asked if she had ruined the mood, and he shook his head. "No. I suppose the subject needed to be addressed eventually. Better now than have me make a mistake I might regret later."
Either way, he grew weary. This had taken its toll on him, and he knew that it was probably best he returned to work.
"I had best get back to work" He admitted softly, motioning to the staff that he wanted a check for his drink. He would pick up his sketchbook and put it away. Something that had been bugging him though, rose back to the surface. Taking a breath, he decided that he might as well ask, even as the pain from those memories began to flock back. Speaking of subjects that needed to be brought up eventually...
"Before I go, I have to ask..." He brought up in a quiet, almost pained tone as he frowned in that moment. "What happened before..." He trailed off. She would know exactly what he meant. It had been their last meeting, after all.
"... Do you resent me for it?" he finally asked. "I won't blame you if you do."
How could he? He knew it needed to be done, and yet deep down, he resented himself too. Not because of who it was, but because he was capable of it.
Final Fantasy X
19
YEARS
Female
Tidus
Heterosexual
294 POSTS
Erin
I live for the people of Spira, and would have gladly died for them, but no more!
Caius brushed aside Yuna’s comments that she had ruined the mood, but she wasn’t sure how much she believed him based on how tired he looked. There was most likely a better time and place where she could have brought all of this up, despite how naturally it had come up in conversation here. Caius was already dealing with enough without this to think about too, but it was too late for her to take it back now. Yuna vowed to be more careful next time instead.
Caius brought up that he probably needed to get back to work, and Yuna nodded respectfully, judging from the angle of the sun streaming in through the windows that they had been talking for a few hours now. “Of course. I don’t want to keep you away from your jobs.” Yuna probably needed to get back on the road herself, so she swung her bag over one shoulder and gathered her staff from where she’d leaned it against the wall. Caius had been sipping a drink when Yuna had first approached, but she’d been too engrossed in their conversation to order anything herself other than the complimentary water, so unlike Caius, she didn’t need to wait for a check. She still left a coin on the table for the waitress’ trouble, and she was preparing to stand up when her friend broached another question.
Yuna felt her smile drop a bit at the topic. Honestly, it wasn’t at all unexpected. What had happened with Darlene was the shoopuf in the room, wasn’t it? She was only surprised that it had taken one of them this long to bring it up. Maybe neither of them had wanted to.
“I don’t resent you, Caius.” Yuna folded her hands in her lap as she tried her best to get her thoughts together. “I...needed time to process what happened. And I don’t think I’ll ever like remembering it,” she admitted. “But it needed to be done. Maybe we could have arrested her, but there were so many of her men there and so many people who needed help. It would have been a nightmare, and a lot of innocent people might have died. But you took care of the problem, and we were able to help everyone escape without anyone getting hurt anymore. I could never resent you for that.”
Smiling slightly, Yuna got to her feet, though she stayed standing by the table. “Anyway, you helped give me a place in this world back when I was still floundering. You’ll always have my respect. Even if I need to yell at you,” she added teasingly before dropping into a slight bow. She was well aware at this point that bowing wasn’t really done in Zephon, but she liked to keep at least that tradition alive with her. It was like keeping a little bit of Spira around.
Straightening up, Yuna gave Caius one last smile. “Keep me updated. I’ll definitely swing by the base more often now that I’m back in the area.”
She promised she didn't resent him, and he gave a small nod in thanks. "In a way, I do resent myself. I've always known I was capable of that, I've said as such, but... Knowing that I still am, and was still willing to, even with the circumstances... It's bothered me since" Caius admitted with a small frown. "Yet, I don't regret it either. In a way, not regretting it bothers me even more, but at the same time... She would have hurt Vordun. And I will never allow anything to happen to him. And you're right... At the end of the day, it was necessary. We saved lives, I suppose I should be thankful there was the opportunity for that."
It still bothered him. But he had slowly grown accustomed to the fact that he had done what he needed to do. Killing Charon, too, was necessary. Celes understood that. She volunteered herself even when Caius had tried to spare her the pain and potential regret that he had felt he would feel from doing it himself. Instead, she had spared him. Without a second thought. In a sense, Celes was his hero. Willing to do what needed to be done no matter how she might be looked at for it, or what she might feel after.
"But... Thank you. I don't know if I could forgive myself if you resented me" he admitted with a small laugh. She said that he had helped her, and for that, he would always have her respect. "As you've helped me" he spoke up. For what, he didn't say. But... He didn't think it was something that needed to be said. She asked to be kept updated, and he smiled as he nodded his head. "Of course" he promised as his cheque arrived and he paid his tab. Rising to his feet, he would remember her bow from before, and tried his best to replicate it. Though slightly different, in that his hand curled into a fist and was placed before his heart as he did so. The Kingsglaive's sign of respect.
"Thank you for taking time out to see me. I hope we can work together again soon" Caius spoke softly as he bade her farewell. Heading out the door, he quickly found himself awash in his thoughts as he began his walk. Everything they had talked about regarding Celes, and love, and... Everything around that just... All came up at once. His thoughts were gravitated toward the choice he had made. He lowered his head unconsciously, before a wetness in his eyes caused him to try to wipe it away with his sleeve as he stopped in his tracks.
He looked down to his soaking sleeve, and then to a nearby window. His reflection showed a face of deep anguish, and a stream of tears running down his face. It was something he had been unconsciously hiding from Yuna, but now that he was alone... There it was.
