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year 5, quarter 3
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Post by Caius Dragelion on Aug 29, 2021 16:21:47 GMT -6
The Dragonglaive
The dagger helped a bit, believe it or not. While he didn't hold it for long, having something in his hands helped him think. When he had a weapon in his hands, he was at his best. That... Pretty much summed up them both, didn't it? But at the end of the day, this was something you couldn't punch your way out of. Some things had to be handled without a weapon. That was a cold, hard reality that the both of them were facing. Though Celes right now was hitting that heavier than Caius was, he could definitely see that. At least, she was for now. Caius wasn't ready to ask those questions just yet.
He continued to listen. That was all he could do, wasn't it? Listen and maybe make some kind of attempt at helping with no idea as to if it might do a thing. He was not good at this. He didn't know if he would ever be good at this. He wished he was. She didn't deserve to feel this way, and if he knew how to help her not feel this way, he wouldn't hesitate. But he didn't, and that was frustrating in of itself. He felt a tinge helpless, as though watching her struggle in battle and not being able to make it to her side even as she stood right there in front of him. All because of his own inadequacies. Or at least, that's how he felt.
In the end, he had to defer to the mantra he had been forced to take for most of his life. Do what you can with what you have. You may not be able to make everything, but at least make something instead of nothing. For now, the best he could do was stare out at the tranquil pond and hope he knew what to say when the time came. This was a battle without weapons. And one he was completely unprepared to fight. Nothing in his experiences had prepared him for this.
”You know, you’re not so bad at this. Dates, I mean. You always see the best in people, and you’re not too shy to say so. You stand by everyone around you and...and…"
Caius turned his head to stare at her as if she'd gone mad. Him being "not so bad" at dates was the last thing he would have considered himself. But, well... He supposed if she said so, there had to be some merit, right? So he appreciated it, he supposed. He scratched his neck a bit sheepishly and moved his head slightly to cover the slight red on his cheeks. But kept an eye on her all throughout, waiting for the rest of her statement. There was a catch, right?
”I don’t know what’s wrong with me.”
Caius chewed on the inside of his cheek a moment, listening as she explained why. Or, best she could. He took a breath before speaking up. "And you thought I was puffing you up" Caius teased, finally striking with a comeback to the date thing, covering his mouth to hide a snort in turn. "But... I get it. Sort of, anyway."
He stared out at the pond again, lightly biting on his lip now. He thought he might feel better if he fidgeted with the dagger again, but even Caius knew that would probably be excessive. And... He knew he needed to learn how to fight his battles without it when required. Even if he didn't know how.
"In a way, I feel similarly. It's easy to just think about the big monster ahead of you, and focus on that goal. Whether it's been for hunts, or the battle in Insomnia, or my work as a Kingsglaive and for the Dragonblades. Everything makes sense with a weapon in my hand and that monster to fight, but... When I don't have that, I... I just... I don't know what to do with myself. Except bury myself in more work. Which I do. Then I don't have to think about it anymore. Jessie thinks I'm mad for it, though. First time I ever had to think maybe that's not a good thing. But then again, she's the only person who's ever even implied it might not be."
He was getting a little personal, wasn't he? Not an oftentimes thing for Caius. His stories to Celes and others had almost always been the heroic fable of Noctis and the Kingdom of Lucis, brought back to the light from ruin. He very rarely actually talked about himself. Not even back in the cave, what seemed like a lifetime ago, had he really talked that much about his own life. Though those were memories Zephon's strange nature had repressed a long time ago, and even he didn't know at the time how to process them. Now though...
"It's... Strange, hearing people think of me as... Well... That. It's nice in a way, it lets me forget for a bit. But there's always that voice that reminds me that perhaps I don't deserve it. It's not like I haven't been selfish. Noctis inspired me in the end, yes... But I didn't go to Insomnia that day because it was the right thing to do. I didn't want to be near people. I didn't show up to be some gallant hero in shining armor that was going to help liberate Lucis. I showed up because I needed money and... Because I don't know what to do without a monster to fight and a weapon in my hand. Noctis was inspiring as a leader, and maybe in a way he made me want to at least try to make things right, but... Had there not been more monsters to fight, and a focused goal as part of it, I don't think a rousing speech would have been enough. I went where I could focus, something I had purpose doing... Well, the only thing I knew how to do."
Caius made a face as he stared down at his reflection. The reflection of a combatant. Nothing more. "If one day, the world was suddenly devoid of hostile monsters and bandits and all of that, I would be lost. And I know that's selfish of me to think of it in a negative way, because I know that should be the goal. But that idea scares me. Sure, I could go back to chocobo farming, but... By itself? That's not me anymore. I don't like to think about it. And I know that's wrong of me. Not wanting to think about a world where things are right as rain, what's wrong with me, right? I don't know if I can consider myself a good person if I look at the Fiends and the Original Sin and all these other monsters and magic people who can destroy planets, and wonder what I would do if they and their ilk were gone. Though... I can't remember the last time I was a good person anyway, I suppose."
Wasn't there supposed to be a point to this? Some kind of "but..." point where he turned it around and made it all better? Or did he just open up because he didn't want her to be alone? He didn't know anymore. This conversation had drifted far too close to some unpleasant memories and it made his head hurt just thinking about it.
"But..."
Well, here goes nothing.
"I want to help people, here and now. That's what I do know. And maybe that has to be enough. My reasons have differed over the years, but in the end, I'm doing it. I don't know if I would be doing it if not for the circumstances that led me here, but I'm doing it and when I do, I feel like I'm in the place I want to be. But I know our situations aren't entirely the same, either."
He tapped his fingers on the wood a bit, a twinge annoyed at himself that he couldn't think of some big reveal to make things better for her. Some kind of sagely advice.
"I don't know if the same thing would help you either, with our circumstances being different, similarities or no. But maybe you will find it as you go. It's... What I did, anyway. One minute I'm fighting without purpose, fighting because it's all I have, the next I'm fighting alongside you because I want to. If that makes sense. I don't know if I deserve to have all of this, but... I am happy doing what I'm doing. However long it lasts."
He looked to her once more. "I hope that whatever makes you happy, you'll find it."
Final Fantasy VI
22
YEARS
Female
Complicated
Heterosexual
429 POSTS
Fin
Use your own eyes and see for yourself whose side I'm on!
[attr=class,lyric1]i've met someone who can accept me
[attr=class,lyric2] for who i am
[attr=class,bulk] Caius wasn’t great at a lot of things. Talking to women, for one. Picking up signals for another. He also wasn’t great at sitting still, dressing up, or catching social cues, but if there was one thing that Caius Dragelion could do well, it was give a speech. She listened, even as the alcohol pulsed like a darkened sea through her ears. She watched the sky and she hummed and she listened.
”Whatever makes me happy, huh?” She smiled wistfully at the moon and then took her head. ”I’ll tell you what it is if I get there.”
How could she stay dour after all that?
She pushed off the railing and straightened her corset. It really was an awful thing, all stiff and stifling. She’d made Jessie promise not to lace it too tight, but there really wasn’t a good way to wear a corset comfortably. Oh well. At least she didn’t plan on getting into any fights tonight.
”You know, I bet there’s plenty of garden left. I want to see all of it if we can. Except for the lighthouse. I’m not climbing that hill.” She made a face and took one last look at the lantern-lit pond -- still and black and shining with stars. Then she pushed a ringlet of hair behind her ear and made her way along the bridge, her heels clicking with every step.
”Remind me never to dress up like this again. I don’t know what I was thinking. If we were to get cornered out here…” She trailed off. ”Though I guess that’s not very likely, is it? I forget where I am sometimes.”
She stopped on the cobble-stone path and waited for Caius to catch up. She didn’t want to rush him. It was a beautiful night, after all.
Celes was silent for a moment, thinking. ”I don’t think you’re a bad person,” she said once he’d reached her. ”And if it helps, I don’t think there will ever be a shortage on bandits and monsters. That’s just the nature of people.”
Celes picked at a piece of lace on her sleeve. ”I’m glad you’ve found your place. That’s all.”
Post by Caius Dragelion on Oct 13, 2021 19:00:34 GMT -6
The Dragonglaive
It was weird that, considering he hadn’t given a real speech in his life. There was that whole story to tell in front of the crowds after the Kraken thing, but did telling a story really count? He didn’t even see what he was saying now as a speech, he just… Talked. Said what was on his mind. Said what he hoped might help. He had no idea if it would, but it was better to try and fail than fail because you never even attempted.
”I’ll tell you what it is if I get there.”
“I know you will.”
And he meant that. If anyone was going to figure this out, it was her. He may lavish her with praise far too much, but at his core it all came from his confidence in her. Perhaps he wasn’t the best at showing that (Such as his hesitation to let her fight the last lieutenant -- not wanting to risk her life in a fight he felt he had started himself) but that hadn’t ever changed.
She wanted to see more of the garden, and he was fine with that. It would do him some good to keep walking and not sit still too long -- too much time to think. He smirked lightly when she mentioned she wasn’t climbing the hill, presumably because of her attire. “I could always carry you up there” he joked, meeting her eyes right then and giving the best expression he could that showed that yes, he was 100% joking and wouldn’t dream of it. No lighthouse for them, then. And he wouldn’t suggest warping either. He knew she hated that.
”Remind me never to dress up like this again. I don’t know what I was thinking. If we were to get cornered out here…”
Caius looked her up and down a moment as they walked, before tugging slightly at the wrist of his own apparel. “Well, this thing may be tight and limiting, but with my abilities I can probably move enough to draw their attention while you find higher ground and cast. The perks of being a magic user, so long as you aren’t swarmed completely, you still have plenty of options regardless of attire” Caius brought up with the slightest of playful smiles. Was that an attempt at another joke? Or was he being matter of fact? Maybe both?
It made him feel a bit better knowing they weren’t entirely helpless, at least. She wasn’t exactly the only one who couldn’t help but wonder if they may be attacked here. As unlikely as it was. Caius was never able to get some things out of his head. Still…
“I’m not too worried, though. With our track record as a team, not many would try”
An attempt to lighten the mood all the same, but there was something there. There were two souls that Caius could relax around properly. That was Vordun (hard to worry with a dragon around) and Celes. He knew that with her around, there weren’t many they couldn’t defeat. Not that he was arrogant enough to think them invincible, but they had overcome impossible odds together. They could handle a few bandits in some stupid formal costumes, right?
Maybe not a Kraken though. Luckily there wasn’t much water in sight.
Gods, he felt lighter than air, was that why he was making all these jokes? Or was it the unbreakable hurricane of dread standing next to him?
She stopped and he caught up soon after, chewing the inside of his cheek as he registered her words. She didn’t think he was a bad person because she didn’t know.
But then again… Something he kept forgetting was that if anyone was going to understand, it was Celes. She had talked of doing plenty of things, and even then, he himself still hadn’t ever lost sight of focusing on the good she’d done instead. He’d done that a lot, hadn’t he? And he didn’t think it was that previous infatuation talking either. Even if he’d managed to dispel it and get his head back, his mind hadn’t changed on that.
It was weird how one small thing she’d said could make him think on that. He didn’t know why. The drink? Maybe. But at the least, her thinking that made him feel a little better. He nodded his head slightly, gratefully. He didn’t know what to say to that, or to what came after.
”I’m glad you’ve found your place. That’s all.”
He managed a smile. “And you will before long.”
Final Fantasy VI
22
YEARS
Female
Complicated
Heterosexual
429 POSTS
Fin
Use your own eyes and see for yourself whose side I'm on!
[attr=class,lyric1]i've met someone who can accept me
[attr=class,lyric2] for who i am
[attr=class,bulk] It seemed she wasn’t the only one irrationally worried about an ambush. As Caius started to talk honest to god battle strategies, Celes couldn’t help but laugh. ”And how am I going to find high ground in a flower garden? Should I climb the topiaries?” Now that was a thought. Celes, in heels and a corset, shimmying up the neck of a hedge-crafted giraffe.
She snorted. ”You could throw me one of your swords. Or maybe I could take off my heels and use one of them as a weapon. They’re sharp enough for it, I think.”
She was feeling sillier than usual. She wanted to blame the alcohol, but she really hadn’t had that much. The champagne was strong, but it was still only a single glass of it. What was it then? The atmosphere? The company? The sheer absurdity of it all?
It felt surreal, strolling through this place of life and beauty beneath a clear starlit sky. This was nothing like home. It was so far beyond it, in fact, that it was like she’d never been there at all. It felt lighter. Sillier. Less consequential.
”It’s good to know we won’t be caught off guard, at least,” she said. ”Considering neither of us ever lower them.” He said that no one would try with their track record, and while she saw his point, she couldn’t find it in herself to agree. Their track record had netted them more than a few powerful enemies, and what better circumstances could they have asked for? Caius was always armed, more or less, but Celes? She was without her sword and tottering around on miniature stilts. It was perfect for an ambush.
Not that there would be one. Thinking otherwise would be pure paranoia.
Caius smiled at her. She hummed back.
Would she ever find her place? It sounded doubtful to her. She had a habit of refusing every place that would take her. Like Caius. Here he was, offering her something lovely and stable and warm, and she just couldn’t help but to walk away.
It was often said that hell was other people, but Celes had to disagree. Hell, she thought, was a ruined wasteland of desperate, tired people ruled on high by a mad god of magic. She might have found her way out, but a place like that never really left you. It just went to sleep for a while, waiting for the best time to drag her back where she belonged.
”I think the roses are next,” she said, gesturing at a sign. She started down the path. ”They were always my favorite. They’re hard to grow, and you have to be careful of the thorns, but they’re often the most beautiful.”
Post by Caius Dragelion on Nov 12, 2021 18:27:43 GMT -6
The Dragonblades
”And how am I going to find high ground in a flower garden? Should I climb the topiaries?”
“Yes” came the dry wit and a playful smirk as he unsuccessfully stifled a chuckle at the thought of her actually trying to climb onto the hedge giraffes. Now that was a sight. And then came the part about stabbing someone with her heels, and he couldn’t hold it in anymore as he broke out in genuine laughter, slightly leaning on her shoulder a moment to keep himself steady. It was only a moment or so before he composed himself, but the big, goofy grin remained.
This was... Nice, wasn't it? It was weird how, what's the word. How free he felt? This was probably one of the easiest conversations he'd had with anyone, much less Celes who he had typically kept a more professional, albeit sometimes very awkward decorum with. There were casual moments, of course. But this, more than anything else felt... Right. He felt almost comfortable. Like it was an afternoon that could last forever and he wouldn't mind one bit. Well, maybe a little, he had to get back to work at some point and that was something always at the foremost of his mind, but...
This was as far away from the life he had grown up with as it could get. It felt like a dream, one he could wake up from at anytime and be plunged back into the thick of it once again. Like it was just... Too good to be real. Would this dream end one day? All of this, not just this afternoon, but the chance, the opportunity to even have it, in of itself was dreamlike in every way. Except for the fact he didn't know if he was dreaming or not. And if he did wake up from it one day... What would he do? That wasn't a question he wanted to think about.
He was snapped back to reality with a snort when she made her remark about how neither of them dropped their guard, ever. He was exaggerating about nobody trying, of course. Trouble found them everywhere. Trouble found them even more when they were together.
The roses were next, she said, and he nodded as he started after her. She mused about how roses were always her favorite, but they were hard to grow, and you have to be careful of the thorns. But they are often the most beautiful, as she put it. "A beautiful thing with dangerous thorns? Always seems to be a catch" he joked softly. He looked to her a moment, and a thought came to him on the subject. But he pushed the thought aside.
"Then again, I would take thorns over it being too good to be true. Story of the last year for me, really" he mused aloud. "Still hard to believe I'm here, able to see and do things like this" he admitted, smiling slightly. "Thorns and all."
Final Fantasy VI
22
YEARS
Female
Complicated
Heterosexual
429 POSTS
Fin
Use your own eyes and see for yourself whose side I'm on!
[attr=class,lyric1]i've met someone who can accept me
[attr=class,lyric2] for who i am
[attr=class,bulk] ”Always seems to be a catch,” Caius said, and Celes huffed in response. He said that he preferred thorns over something being too good to be true, and in a way, Celes had to agree. But only in the figurative sense.
”Says the man who’s never tried gardening. I’ve been pricked more times than I want to count.” Still, she couldn’t deny the appeal of the flowers. They were her favorite, after all. She supposed the danger in caring for them only made her love stronger. They were difficult which made the reward more satisfying.
She hadn’t realized how much she’d missed gardening.
”There they are.” They strolled into the rose garden, and she stopped to admire them. There were flowers of all colors and sizes, all of them rolled up into their soft, familiar petals. She liked the white ones best. They were the hardest to keep from shriveling.
Celes wandered towards them wistfully. Her favorite part, she thought, was the smell. Roses had a particularly strong and distinct fragrance. It made her think of peaceful times sitting among the leaves and the flowers with the sun hanging overhead. In her memories, her garden was the only splash of color in the entire miserable city of Vector.
She reached out and touched the rose’s soft petals. It was delicate in her hand. Fragile. ”You know,” she said slowly, ”I think I’d want to live somewhere like this. Not here exactly, but…Maybe I’d like my own garden again. I haven’t thought about it in years.” Her old concerns had been replaced with new ones in this strange new world. Before that, there’d been survival in a wasteland and before that, the rebellion. Ever since she’d started taking her military training seriously, there hadn’t been time for flowers. She’d have been laughed at if any of the soldiers had found out. So she’d let it go. All for the sake of…what exactly?
She turned to Caius and nodded sharply. ”It’s decided then. Wherever I end up, I’ll grow flowers. And if someone doesn’t want to hire a mercenary who likes roses then I don’t have to take their job, do I?” She smirked faintly. ”That doesn’t sound like the kind of person I’d want to work for anyway.”
Post by Caius Dragelion on Dec 15, 2021 14:27:39 GMT -6
The Dragonblades
"I am fully aware, Miss Chere, of what thorns can do. I used to water them back home" he teased with a small laugh. "I used to clumsily bumble around with the watering can, getting more water on my toes than I did in the actual flowers. Once my hand slipped into the beds and well, I wasn't allowed to water them unsupervised after that."
He let that visual sink in for a moment. "Seemed so simple back then. Water them once or twice a day, and they sprout and keep up. Only long after that did I find out it was a lot more than that" he added with a small, cheeky smile. Everything seemed so simple back then, literally everything. Childhood was so free, simple and liberating. Even if Caius' had been cut very, very short. He didn't know if he missed those simple pleasures, simply because it had been so long he could hardly remember them.
"Perhaps you'll have to teach me how to garden proper sometime though, since you're the big expert."
Oh, he wasn't going to let her get away with that remark about the thorns. He'd torment her to kingdom come for that one. Not that he'd mind trying to garden, but... He didn't know if he'd have the time to keep one up. He was always traveling, after all.
They soon traveled to the rose garden, and even he could tell right away that Celes was completely enamored. He couldn't help but smile softly as he trailed a bit behind her, letting her take it all in unobstructed by his large frame. Caius himself meanwhile, couldn't help but peer at the roses curiously. It's strange. For whatever reason, he had thought all roses were red. That's what literature and poetry had told him in the books. Roses are red, violets are blue... Something like that. But there were a lot more than just red roses here. Perhaps he had just forgotten this tidbit from his childhood? He couldn't remember. So that surprised him a fair bit. Go figure, huh? Another thing his sheltered self was finding out for the first time. The only reason he even knew they were roses was because they shared the same shape as the red ones, and also because Celes had specifically indicated she wanted to see them.
Celes returned to talking about flowers and feelings, furthering the idea she wanted a garden. Well, at least she was finding some goals in the midst of her self-finding pilgrimage. It was as good a start as any, really. But when Celes turned to him and all-serious declared she would live somewhere with a garden, and damn any clients who had a problem with it, he couldn't hold in his laughter. It was just how serious and straightforward about it she sounded, he couldn't help it!
"I'm sure we can throw something in the rulebook somewhere about clients who have a serious thing about flower-favoring mercenaries" came his own bout of cheek in turn. He scratched his chin a moment in thought. "Perhaps sometime in the next week we can look into some of those soil pots and some flower seeds? Make the base look nice. While it looks homely, it is a little bare in places. It's no flower garden, but... It's as good a start as any if you want the practice for your future home garden."
He had promised to support her next step, whatever it may be. The least he could do was make little suggestions like that. And maybe it'd raise morale a bit if the place looked a little nicer?
Final Fantasy VI
22
YEARS
Female
Complicated
Heterosexual
429 POSTS
Fin
Use your own eyes and see for yourself whose side I'm on!
[attr=class,lyric1]i've met someone who can accept me
[attr=class,lyric2] for who i am
[attr=class,bulk] Oh right. Caius used to be a farmhand before his Glaive business, didn’t he? It had been a careless mistake on her part, but Caius seemed to take it lightly. He joked back at her about his time in the field, and she blushed faintly. ”I…well, you weren’t growing roses, were you?” she retorted. It wasn’t exactly a graceful comeback, but it didn’t have to be. They were friends, after all. These kinds of things were all in good fun.
”You’d like to learn?” she asked. It was strange to hear a man interested in gardening. Besides her grandfather, that was. ”Well, I don’t know how much I’ve forgotten. I haven’t tried my hand at it in years, but…I could try.” She smiled. ”We might go through a few bad seasons though. Flowers are finicky things.”
And she didn’t know the region, did she? Torensten’s lush subtropical forests were a far cry from the greenhouses of Vector. The world had seemed sterile there – everything natural, tamed and in its place. These humid coasts were wild in comparison, always flooding, always springing new and unusual life. Maybe she’d start with the local plants before she tried for something so ambitious as a rose bush. Assuming that she decided to stay in Torensten to begin with.
Which brought her back to thoughts of the future. Never before had it seemed so open and so malleable. She wasn’t sure that she liked the view.
”I could plant something around the yard,” she said. ”Before I leave for Provo.”
She didn’t know when that would be. She didn’t know for how long. She didn’t know what she’d do when she got there. But it seemed like as good a place as any for a change of scenery even if she hadn’t mentioned it since their uneasy conversations at the dive bar he’d taken her to a few weeks prior. She liked to build things, she decided. She liked to plant them and watch them grow. Yuna’s sect was promising, but it still hadn’t grown its roots. What it had in good intentions it lacked in firepower. Perhaps she could be the one to bring it to her.
Working with Yuna, she’d be the one on the frontlines instead of always stuck on support, slinging spells and healing magic reactively. She wondered how it would feel to fight with a white mage at her side. Yuna’s magic was nothing to sneeze at.
”It’s been nice. Staying with you.” Celes reached out and touched the velvet-soft petal of a white rose. ”You’ve been nice. Everything has been…”Nice. She sighed. ”I’ll stop by when I can. I don’t want to be away from you, strictly, but I need space to find myself. And I’ll have to see how the flowers are doing once I’ve planted them.” She glanced at him. ”I'm glad we’ve had this night together. Even if it didn’t quite turn out like I’d expected.”
Post by Caius Dragelion on Jan 8, 2022 16:57:15 GMT -6
The Dragonblades
Well, chocobo rancher specifically. He laughed a bit at her attempting a retort. “I don’t remember, I just know we had a flower garden around the ranch. I almost feel like I’m reliving the memories of another person when I think about it, so the details are a little hazy” he responded sheepishly, scratching his head in turn. But she actually seemed surprised when he expressed interest in learning. “I mean, I don’t see why not” he answered, completely unaware that it was strange for a man to be interested in gardening. He had… Helped, garden when he was young. Why would that change in perception now that he was an adult? It wouldn’t have made sense even if you told him. “Trust me, Cel. You’ve probably forgotten more about gardening than I know about gardening. Anything you can recall is fine with me. I think it would just be nice to learn, however much it is.”
Right, her trip. She talked about possibly planting before she left. “Well at the very least, my learning means I can probably help with tending it while you’re away” he spoke, trying his best to keep the mood light. Well, it might already be light but she seemed a bit awkward with even the mention of leaving, so… He was doing his best to assess the situation and act. Can’t hurt to plan ahead.
“Cel” he spoke up when she tried to explain that she wasn’t trying to be away from him specifically. He was smiling though, so he probably wasn’t upset at her. “That’s sweet of you, to think of me. But I understand. Perhaps I do not completely understand your reasons, as much as I have tried and think I have a general gist, but what’s important is that you clearly need this. That is what I do get. You do what’s going to make you happy and at your best, and I can man the fort. And the flowers… Preferably after you teach me.”
“Not turning out like expected” was an understatement. But… He smiled brightly all the same. “With how it’s gone, I don’t think I would have had this any other way” he admitted softly. It may not have gone the way they had expected, but they had learned a lot about one another. He felt like now, he knew her. For real this time. Perhaps there could have been a chance for them each to meet someone new, but… Honestly? He wouldn’t trade this night for one with anyone else. And it was one he would remember always.
Final Fantasy VI
22
YEARS
Female
Complicated
Heterosexual
429 POSTS
Fin
Use your own eyes and see for yourself whose side I'm on!
[attr=class,lyric1]i've met someone who can accept me
[attr=class,lyric2] for who i am
[attr=class,bulk] Caius chastised her. It wasn’t serious chastising, but still. It made her feel like she was overreacting or perhaps over-explaining herself. Why should she feel as though she had to tell him everything if she didn’t feel as though she were doing something wrong? It was almost like an apology. And he told her it wasn’t necessary.
She let out a breath. ”Right.” Sometimes fewer words said more. He was right. There was no need to get herself in a tizzy about it.
She hummed as Caius went on. He wouldn’t have had this night go any other way. She supposed she felt the same though she wasn't inclined to tell him so. That was a dangerous thought that wavered too close to intimacy for her liking.
”It’s been nice,” she said, and it was true. It had all been nice. In a way, it almost felt like a send off. One final night to enjoy herself before she was off on the next chapter of her life and whatever it might bring. She wondered.
Was she really getting away to grow? Or was she just driving herself further to self-destruction?
”I’m glad to have had this time to talk to you,” she said. ”Though it is getting late, isn’t it? And these heels are murder.” She lifted one up as though to better illustrate what she meant. Unless he’d ever tried to walk on half a stilt, she doubted he’d understand.
”Even still, perhaps I’d like to find a reason to dress up like this again. There’s nothing practical about it. I feel ridiculous, really, but it hasn’t been all terrible. I quite like these earrings.” Golden, dangling nightmares as they were. In a fight, they would be ripped right out of her ears. That’s part of what she liked about them though. They were a loud declaration that she had no intentions of fighting today, thank you very much.
”Would you mind if we walked back? Then we still have the tram ride home.” Back to her apartment. Back to his homestead. Or maybe they’d both split the difference and collapse in the spare rooms of the Wyvern’s Rest. Neither of them could ever make a good enough distinction between work and life. Celes spent half her nights sleeping at their headquarters because she didn’t feel like going anywhere else.
