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year 5, quarter 3
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Post by Caius Dragelion on Apr 6, 2021 9:30:49 GMT -6
The Dragonglaive
Caius had spent plenty of downtime reading through the archives in Insomnia, and later read a fair bit of literature in Zephon. Combined with serving in the military, it had given him his distinct use of language, filling in so many blanks after he had spent so much time with very little communication with... Well, anybody or anything for the better part of his life. Speaking this way had become natural to him, and he didn't even realize it was unusual or what it could be linked to. The problem was that he lacked the experience in using it. A powerful weapon was nothing if one didn't know how to use it. But while Kingsglaive were weaponmasters, this was one weapon that Caius had no idea how to use.
He fidgeted when she talked about the undead. "I don't know if I've mentioned this, but you remember when we went to that cave? And those undead-like things showed up? The ones clearly undead but not fully rotted and eking some kind of black goop? Back in my world, those things were everywhere" Caius admitted. Which probably explained why he had been so uncomfortable when they showed up. "By what I read from the archives, the Empire, or well, the Empire where I lived, kidnapped people and turned them into these things to weaponize them. It's also suspected that as they couldn't churn out the proper volume they needed for war, they started actually making people, for the purpose of turning them into those things" he admitted, shuddering at the thought. "Point being, I think I can at least understand. Everything was dead, from the trees, to the grass, to the soulless husks that I fought through practically everyday. Especially when I became Kingsglaive. Then it was Empire bases for breakfast, lunch and dinner."
But the topic wasn't done getting heavy. Caius wasn't sure what to think of how Celes viewed the situation regarding the innocent blood she had shed. Was there really no way to atone? No... He supposed there wasn't. She did it. Just as he'd done it. Nothing either of them could do would bring back the ones they'd hurt.
"I guess not" he spoke softly, placing the glass down as he looked down at his hands. But what could they do? Dwelling on it too much made for poor health and poor decision-making on the field, which meant he couldn't prevent there being more blood on his hands. Not maliciously spilled, but was spilling it out of negligence any better?
"I guess you're right. Things have changed" he admitted quietly. "Perhaps the best thing either of us can do is learn to forgive, but not forget. We can't atone, but... We can still make a difference for somebody."
He really should tell her the truth eventually, but this didn't seem like the best time. He'd get to it eventually. The subject had really, definitely gotten heavy. Celes appeared to sense this just as well as he had, because she changed the subject pretty quickly. He would have had no reason to complain, if not for the specific subject matter that Celes had picked. Caius subtly shifted uncomfortably at Celes’ last little soliloquy. He hadn’t expected to revisit this subject and her words weren’t exactly music to his ears either. Not to mention the subject itself had proven to be a ticking timebomb so far. But he didn’t think he could just abstain from speaking without provoking suspicion. He wished he still had drink left for this.
“Now who’s the poet?” Caius teased softly with a faint smile. “I… I know, though. But it’s ok. I don’t mind, I like you the way you are. You’re my friend for a reason after all” he brought up. Oh, he made sure to include that friend part this time. Caius had learned his lesson about saying those things without explicitly stating them to be platonic. He was not arming that bomb again.
“But…” he trailed off, a little unsure at first about what he was about to say. He stared out at the expanse before them, finding his words. But he knew deep down, as much as it might hurt to say, it was the right thing to do. “I’m pretty confident that someday, there’ll be someone, hopefully as close as possible to what you imagine, who’ll be quite happy with all that you are. Someone who doesn’t see these things about you as difficult, they just see you as… Well… You. And to them, it’ll be just right. So… Maybe don’t give up on that dream just yet, if you feel strongly about it. It might not be today, but… We don’t always know what tomorrow will bring.”
Perhaps this was what Yuna had meant. If you cared about someone to that degree, you’d do anything to see them happy. Caius hadn’t imagined it taking a form like this, but… It felt like the right thing to do. Doing right by his friend, and someone that he cared for and cherished.
Final Fantasy VI
22
YEARS
Female
Complicated
Heterosexual
429 POSTS
Fin
Use your own eyes and see for yourself whose side I'm on!
[attr=class,lyric1]i've met someone who can accept me
[attr=class,lyric2] for who i am
[attr=class,bulk] Caius called her a poet. Had she said something to give that impression? She supposed she should have been embarrassed, sharing her romantic dreams like that. On another night, maybe she would have been, but right now? It was on her mind to say the least. And she hadn’t spent two hours doing her hair and makeup then struggled into a corset to keep quiet.
”I don’t know if that’s how it works,” she said. Her? Being ‘just right?’ She wanted someone to like her for who she was, and she thought she’d found a few, but she knew she couldn’t be right all the time. If they thought that then they must not have known her very well. ”But that’s nice of you. I just…”
She curled a rivulet of hair around her finger. She wished that Yuna was here. Or maybe Jessie. Someone she could really talk about these things with without feeling like she was rubbing Caius’ nose in something. They’d both been in love, she thought, or they acted interested at least. While Celes…
Had it really been love that she’d felt? With Locke? She didn’t know anymore.
Celes swigged the last of her champagne and stretched out, making a short noise before she teetered back to her feet. ”Well. I guess we can’t stay here all night.” The path went down to a grove of trees with a pond tucked in it. At least that’s what the map had said. After that was the lighthouse, but she wasn’t about to climb up there if her life depended on it. Something about standing on the edge of a seaside cliff just didn’t sit well with her.
”I guess we shouldn’t talk about work. We do that enough as it is.” Celes started down the path, carefully setting her empty glass onto a receptacle placed next to the trash can. ”So why don’t you tell me something about yourself? Something that’s not fighting or some tragic past. Everything’s always so heavy with us.”
Post by Caius Dragelion on Apr 12, 2021 12:09:02 GMT -6
The Dragonglaive
Of course she couldn't be right all the time, nobody was perfect, Caius knew that. But he did want to believe that even with her flaws, someone would find her appealing. Something he appeared to have figured out through experience.
"Maybe not" Caius responded with a soft, bittersweet smile when Celes said that's not how it worked. Caius wasn't exactly an expert on how relationships worked. Even he knew that. "It may be naïve of me, but that's just how I feel. So I'm going to keep believing you'll find the right person for you. At the least, you have someone on your team in all this. Even if I'm probably no Yuna. Or Jessie" he admitted with a small chuckle. Those ladies clearly had themselves pretty together. Caius did not. But he'd at least try for her, however he could.
This wasn't exactly something he wanted to talk about. But friends were there for each other. The least he could do was try and give her a little hope while she pursued... Better help than him.
He was quite happy to get up and keep walking. Walking was a good distraction. He nodded his head as he got to his feet, motioning for her to lead the way. She then inquired about telling something about himself. Ooh, that was tough. Something not heavy? Even tougher. "Hmm... Well, you already know I'm a weaponsmith, but I guess that might count as work anyway. I dropped that I grew up on a chocobo farm earlier, so that's out too" he mused aloud, almost amused at how this wasn't an easy thing to think of ideas for. "Truth be told, I don't just build weapons for the practicality of it. I'm actually quite interested in weaponry as a whole, even outside the realm of work. Someone called me a weapon nerd, which I guess is pretty accurate" he admitted with a small laugh. "I like to take guesses at the make of each weapon, their origins and what they were used for. Jessie took me to the museum in Torensten recently, which I guess was... Enjoyable. I was able to tell that even the symbolic-looking weapons likely had a physical purpose beyond intimidation and a show of power, if wielded a certain way. They kept the weapons in great condition which did a number on hiding the nicks, but I was able to find them. It was kind of fun trying to find little details like that. And it told me a lot about how seriously Torenstenians of the past took their weaponry."
That was a lot. He didn't expect to find that much information, but there it was. Even he seemed a little taken aback by it, but he soon just shrugged it off. Maybe the alcohol made it easier once he got going? Who knows? "What about you?" he inquired. She'd hopefully have an easier time finding something than him.
Final Fantasy VI
22
YEARS
Female
Complicated
Heterosexual
429 POSTS
Fin
Use your own eyes and see for yourself whose side I'm on!
[attr=class,lyric1]i've met someone who can accept me
[attr=class,lyric2] for who i am
[attr=class,bulk] ”A weapons nerd.” Celes paused and then laughed to herself, perhaps more delicately than usual. In these heels with his corset and this hair, she found her mannerisms were more girlish than when she was comfortable. Funny, that. ”What are your favorite weapons then? From people that you’ve seen? And what do you think of mine?” This was fun, wasn’t it? A little at least. It felt something like banter. That was new.
”You certainly have a lot to say about it. I’m not really interested myself. Weapons are weapons. I use them and sometimes they’re better than others.” She shook her head. ”I have a friend, Edgar. He’s an engineer. He talks just like you when he’s working on his machines. By the end of it all, he was hacking monsters apart with a chainsaw.”
That had been something to witness. Something grisly and not particularly pleasant. There had been blood.
So much blood.
”Something about myself. That's a hard question, isn’t it?” She smiled at him apologetically. She’d been the one to start all this, after all. ”Hm. You already know about the flowers. I could go on and on about the Returners, but I think I’ve already mentioned everyone in it before.” She took a moment to think about it. There were certain things she liked, like her magic sword training, that were obvious. There were other things, like her taste in men, that were inappropriate.
Something that interested her…
”I like...Well, I like. Shopping.” She felt her cheeks go red. Damn them. ”I like jewelry and scarves. I have a collection of different earrings. Most of them are magically enhanced, but I just like the look of them, really.”
Something told her to stop talking. She should stop right there if she wanted to preserve the rest of her dignity. Flowers? Shopping? Jewelry? He’d never take her seriously again.
”Then I suppose I like...soft things. Like plush. Terra got me into them.” Or rather, Terra had given her a stuffed chocobo as a gift and Celes had awkwardly accepted. It wasn’t until she’d squirreled it away with the rest of her belongings that she’d realized that she’d rather liked it. There was something comforting about clutching a plush pillow to your chest in the night. Sometimes.
But she hadn’t had nearly enough champagne to say that.
Celes withdrew, still blushing. ”Don’t make fun of me.”
Post by Caius Dragelion on Apr 15, 2021 19:17:11 GMT -6
The Dragonglaive
Well, that was quite the question that Celes had just asked, wasn't it? "Are you sure?" he asked with a light tilt of his head. "You're going to get me going on a tangent asking those kinds of questions, Cel" Caius remarked with an amused smirk in turn. "Again."
He laughed at that. Even he was aware he'd been doing it lately. "It's always you who gets me on these, I swear" he admitted between a chuckling fit. He'd... Try to keep it short and sweet. Try. “Well, you’ve been warned. Favorite weapons… Well obviously I’m a little biased towards my own gunblade. Versatile, operates like a single-handed blade with a guard I can switch on and off depending on if I’m using melee for guarding, or if I need to aim the gun portion with better vision and less weight on the sides to hinder my balance.”
He remembers then that he can summon said sword. So he does. He gives it a once over.
“I’ve taken this thing apart a hundred times now. But while I’ve re-painted them, I’ve never replaced parts of the hilt and pommel that I could afford to keep when modifying it. My father gave me this sword to train with when I was about nine. So it holds some sentimental value to me. As for other weapons..." he trailed off as his sword disappeared again. "Two come to mind. One belonged to a fellow in Sonora with a bulky sword bigger and longer than my arm. Clearly takes a lot of strength, but with whatever its made of, I watched the man chop through durasteel with ease. Made the "weapon nerd" in me swoon a little bit, made me a little envious too" he admitted with a laugh. His voice had raised in pitch a little bit as he spoke about the weapon, and his expression, down to his eyes had completely lit up in excitement. His mannerisms had become more pronounced and exaggerated as he went through it. "If I can get a better look at it, figure out what it's made of and how it's weighted to where he can hold it like a sword instead of like a big hammer, I'd kind of love to replicate one of my own. I don't have any heavy weapons in my arsenal, and my powers can hold one more weapon in its space if I so choose."
He didn't have to think too much about the other one that came to mind. He could still imagine it clear as day. "Then there's this katana I saw wielded by a swordsman in Provo. Made of a synthesized metal that I've never seen or even heard of before, yet somehow it's lightweight enough to let the man easily hold up a sword that is so long, it's probably longer than both our heights combined."
He took a minute to think on her sword. He'd only ever seen it when they were on assignment, so it took a minute. But once he did, he figured he could let himself rattle off a little bit. This was -her- sword after all. "Hmm... Medium-length, narrow blade, if I recall correctly. Good choice for your build and fighting style. The guard is interesting, I've seen curved swords but never a straight blade with a lopsided guard before. You're probably used to wielding it by now, but I assume it takes a bit to then adjust to training swords during your lessons with the recruits. On the flip side, the average swordsman won't see your guard at first glance, which gives you a temporary advantage in melee combat as they don't know right away how to deal with your defenses. Which actually, is quite perfect for you. It buys you time if the enemy gets too close, to defend yourself long enough to make distance so you can cast. The blade itself is also perplexing to me, I've never seen that kind of metal. That, or the steel is enchanted to look the way it does and to harness that magic-draining ability you use. Overall it's definitely one of the more interesting swords I've seen. Where did you get it, if I might ask?"
Oh they were going to bat questions back and forth, were they? Well, at least it kept things lively. The chainsaw thing got a laugh out of him too. But his attention was caught when Celes found her thing to tell. He quirked a brow as Celes spoke something that made her cheeks go red. It did make him laugh in surprise, which she probably didn't want. The "Don't make fun of me" caused a slight sputter too.
"I apologize for laughing, I was just surprised. Or well, sort of anyway" he admitted sheepishly. "Hmm, how do I put this... With how you carry yourself, it seems surprising on the surface. But part of me deep down... Kind of figured, too. Maybe not those exact specifics, but I had a feeling. I learned a long time ago to look past the surface with you."
He smiled softly. "I think it's nice. Both in that you can find things you enjoy outside of work, and that you can find something that just makes you melt, no matter how much fighting you do" Caius admitted as he scratched his head. He did that a lot when he was anxious, it seemed. It was always either varying parts on the left temple, the ear, or the back of the neck too. "Besides, it's not like I have room to talk. I have a soft spot for the small and squishy, especially animals. You saw my eyes light up when Vordun hatched. Even back when I tried to hide, I wasn't exactly subtle."
Final Fantasy VI
22
YEARS
Female
Complicated
Heterosexual
429 POSTS
Fin
Use your own eyes and see for yourself whose side I'm on!
[attr=class,lyric1]i've met someone who can accept me
[attr=class,lyric2] for who i am
[attr=class,bulk] Well Caius certainly had a lot to say.
She’d known he would, obviously, and he’d even apologized ahead of time. She’d brought this on herself, hadn’t she, but for now she didn’t really mind. He was passionate. This excited him, and that left her a little happier than before. She couldn’t relate, but she nodded along anyway, laughing sometimes when his eyes grew bright. She hummed and she nodded and she tried to listen the best she could. A lot of the more technical talk went over her head.
This was nice, wasn’t it? It was nice.
”My sword?” Celes asked once the questioning was directed back to her. ”I never thought about any of that. I guess it is good for me, isn’t it? I always liked it. Mostly for that whole absorbing magic thing.” She smirked faintly. ”It was developed by the empire’s weapons department. Made specially for their best magiteck knight. That’s me, by the way.” She pushed a few ringlets of hair behind her ear. ”I don’t know anything about how it was made. It was commissioned, issued to me, and I’ve been using it ever since.”
It was the last remnant of the empire in her life. She wondered if she should feel more conflicted about that. She didn’t.
Of far, far more importance were her feelings on Caius’ laugh.
”I told you no!” she said. She felt her cheeks grow even hotter. ”I don’t see what’s so funny.”
That was a lie. She did. Which was exactly why she was so embarrassed.
”Everyone has something going on beneath the surface,” she said with a short ’hmph.. Of course he knew that which was why he'd apologized. He hadn’t done anything wrong, but she was having too much fun getting into a huff to care. ”I don’t melt.”
Also a lie. Oh well.
”I know all about Vordun.” She looked at him, smiling sardonically. ”You felt like a true father. I suppose that's how he must see you. Since you’ve cared for him and all.” It really was, well, nice now that she thought about it. Liking weapons and dragons wasn’t exactly the least manly of passions, but his sheer joy in them did put it over the top. It was nice.
She laughed.
”It’s like we didn’t really know each other. Before this, I mean. I guess there’s only so much you can learn when all you do is work.” She drifted to a stop as they came across a pond tucked into a grove of trees with soft, overhanging branches. It was like coming across an oasis in a desert. A secret place, tucked deeply away, waiting for someone to stumble across it. Celes walked slowly forward, carefully taking it in as though the silence might be broken at any moment.
”It’s beautiful,” she said. Lights had been hung from the trees, wrapping around the trees and setting their leaves in a dim glow. The light shimmered across the water in a glassy reflection. Flowering lily pads were scattered over the surface. On one of them, she saw a frog, staring back at her with its beady eyes.
”Have you ever seen anything like it?” She wandered towards the bridge which crossed over the water in a stone arch. She couldn’t tear her eyes away.
Post by Caius Dragelion on Apr 25, 2021 12:00:48 GMT -6
The Dragonglaive
Caius was sheepishly self-aware about how much he could talk when he got going. Which was still weird to him, considering he had previously been used to talking as little as possible. But there was something about certain topics, and certain people, that got him going and even he didn't think he could stop himself. Slow it down, tone it back perhaps. But he didn't see himself going back to the way he was before. Was this a good thing or bad? He wasn't sure. Though it only seemed to happen when he lowered his guard.
Still, he wouldn't lie that it wasn't fun to talk about this stuff. Caius really was a weapons nerd. This sort of thing was always exciting for him.
He listened attentively as Celes detailed similar circumstances to Sephiroth's sword, for her own. So she didn't know its origin. Fair enough. She confirmed though, that her Runic ability was tied to her sword. That was definitely interesting. How did one go around getting enchanted swords like that? Though he supposed he had managed to add his own little "enchantment" to his swords, so to speak. Not magical in nature, but they suited their purpose. But it was still interesting to hear about the background behind hers. He figured she was important to the Empire if they made her a General, but to have a weapon specially commissioned for her was another thing entirely. It must have been quite the blow to them when she defected.
Caius laughed even harder when Celes protested and pouted over said laughter. He wasn't making fun of her, of course, and he'd made sure she knew that. But it was kind of adorable in of itself seeing her get worked up over something like that. And not in the way that had stressed the both of them out in previous instances. This was different. This was lighthearted, laid-back and playful. This was an experience, wasn't it? It was hard to describe, but the whole thing made him feel as light as air.
Yeah, he figured he hadn't been subtle about Vordun. He spoiled and fawned over the dragon like his own child. Celes pointed out that Vordun must see him as its father, and Caius nodded his head. "It's likely. I consider Vordun sort of akin to my own child at this point" he admitted softly. He hadn't put too much thought into it. It just was. "It's always weird taking him out onto the field with me. I worry about him. But I also know it's where he wants to be. He gets grumpy when I go out without him" he added, smirking lightly at the thought of Vordun's smoke-blowing snort pouting when Caius wasn't taking him along. Even when he'd been injured in Sonora and exhausted against the Kraken, and Caius had given him proper breaks full times, Vordun still made sure he knew that the dragon wasn't happy with not being taken along.
”It’s like we didn’t really know each other. Before this, I mean. I guess there’s only so much you can learn when all you do is work.”
"I guess so" he agreed as they stopped. He peered down at their reflections in the pond as they began to slow their strides going forward. "This might sound a bit sappy, and perhaps a little bizarre given the circumstances, but... I'm kind of glad we have an opportunity like this" Caius admitted sheepishly. He had thought he'd known her well all this time, but perhaps they hadn't really known each other that well at all. At least not until now. It turned out that he just hadn't been looking deep enough into that pond. Then again, it was safe to say he didn't know how. But things were changing, weren't they? He was vaguely aware of this fact, but... He didn't quite know how to process it. Not yet, anyway.
This certainly wasn't how he imagined learning something like that. Or about her, as well. This whole scenario had been nothing short of an incredibly bizarre adventure. But he wasn't complaining.
Caius' attention was entrapped by the sights around them. ”It’s beautiful,” Celes spoke up, and Caius silently, slowly nodded his head in agreement. His mouth part-open, his eyes beheld a slight glow as they reflected back the lights. He couldn't speak, not at first. His only noise was the slow rise and fall of his breath as his gaze moved from one point to another, as if wanting to take in everything possible within the time they had. His eyes met the frog's for a moment, and Caius could almost swear that it looked a bit like the King.
”Have you ever seen anything like it?”
"No" he spoke softly, finally managing to find some semblance of speech within him. "This world and its wonders never cease to amaze me. This though... This is something else" Caius admitted as a large, creased hand traced the stone surface of the bridge as they reached it. There was a magic to this place. He felt as if he could stay here forever, and never tire of it.
Final Fantasy VI
22
YEARS
Female
Complicated
Heterosexual
429 POSTS
Fin
Use your own eyes and see for yourself whose side I'm on!
[attr=class,lyric1]i've met someone who can accept me
[attr=class,lyric2] for who i am
[attr=class,bulk] ”Hm.” Celes drifted to the center of the bridge then stopped, leaning against the railing. She folded both of her arms together on top of it, her heels crossed behind her as she looked into the deep, velvet-black water. The light of the paper lanterns sparkled across it, highlighting every ripple and cluster of algae. All around them, she heard the pulsing hum of crickets. Celes closed her eyes.
She expected that with her eyes closed, she’d imagine herself somewhere else far away from here. But no, this wasn’t Figaro or Jidoor or Thamasa. This was Torensten. She knew that. Somewhere deep down, she knew she was exactly where she should be.
Celes stood there for a while in silence, sometimes watching the water and sometimes just listening. The weight of the champagne made her feel pleasantly numb. Caius was a man who could live with a little break in the conversation, wasn’t he?
”All this time, it’s felt like I’m a broken piece of glass.”
She didn’t know where that had come from. The champagne, probably, or maybe it was carried along by the night itself. She looked down, and picked at the railing with her nail. ”All this time, I’ve been trying so hard to stitch myself back together. But I don’t know how, and I think some of the pieces might be missing.”
This was all flowery language coming for her, wasn’t it? She wasn’t sure if Caius would follow. He was poetic, but not the best at conversation.
And she wasn’t exactly sure where she was going with this herself.
”I keep trying to push forward, but there’s all this glass in the way. I can try to creep around it, but…” She bit her tongue and glanced at him apologetically. ”I’m not making sense, am I?”
Of course she wasn’t. She was drunk.
”It’s hard. That’s all I meant.” She sighed. ”I don’t know how long I can keep this up.”
Post by Caius Dragelion on Jul 13, 2021 10:09:35 GMT -6
The Dragonglaive
A still quiet was all to behold, giving Caius time to think. Spending this time getting to know Celes as who she really was had honestly begun to give Caius perspective. What really defined how he felt? What he thought to be love was for someone that he ended up knowing very little about. That didn’t sound like love in the way Yuna put it. And maybe it wasn’t. Or perhaps it was and he had allowed his trust in her to become more without considering the ramifications. He didn’t know for sure. But what he had begun to realize was that while Yuna had done her best to help, she could only give her own perspective from her own experiences. She could only tell things based on how Yuna saw what he had said, and how he had answered her questions. But Yuna was not Caius. Yuna did not have the upbringing that Caius did. Caius’ mind was a mess, he understood this. He lacked the same social conditioning and experiences that most had, and even just having someone as close and trusted as Celes to begin with was still a new thing for him.
At the end of the day, Caius knew he had to figure out what those types of feelings were for him. Not what they were considered to be normally. Finding out who Celes was outside of the battlefield had not changed the fact she was a close and trusted friend. But as far as more goes… He had to figure out his own definition of that for himself.
He supposed it made him feel a little bit better about how this had all turned out. If he did come to a conclusion later that led to her viewpoint being a source of strife for him, he’d deal with it when it came and move forward. He had moved forward from worse, he told himself. Either way, it was no big deal, right? There didn’t need to be romantic feelings involved for him to enjoy her company as he was now. She was still his best friend, or at least he liked to think so. He had no clue if that was a mutual thing. There was so much he was just learning now, after all.
His thoughts filled the silence as he stared out at the waters. Then Celes spoke up. And they were back to heavy. Caius wasn't sure how to respond at first, so he just listened. He took a deep breath as he leaned forward on the bridge, his chin resting on his arms as they lay spread across the wood. As her voice faded, there was silence for a few moments longer. Time to process. Caius brought his head upright a moment.
"I think I understand the general consensus, at the very least" he answered softly. He held out a hand, summoning one of the twin daggers, twirling it between his fingers. "I wish I had some answer that could make it alright, some magic cure all tied to some evil monster we could kill and all of a sudden, the world is right as rain again. I would be by your side for that fight in a heartbeat" he added, with a small, sheepish smile. If only it were that easy. That was something the both of them could do, easy enough. It was simple, in their wheelhouse. This? This was in neither of their wheelhouses. It wasn't even in their houses. Still, he felt helpless. He wanted to help. But...
"Unfortunately that only works when the world's in danger" he admitted remorsefully as the dagger disappeared. "But... I think it's a good first step, admitting to it. Because there's something I've learned in my time here. From you, especially. And that's the fact you don't have to do this alone" the mercenary decided on as an answer. He looked to her, and actually managed a more sincere, almost amused smile as a thought came to him. "Something else I've learned is that Celes Chere doesn't give up easy. She sees a goal and she shoots for the stars. Even when it gets tough."
A silence. A moment of respite, to think. To consider. He took a breath as his gaze softened once more. "I don't know what path you have to walk to find your missing pieces. But if you'll have me, I'll walk it with you."
Final Fantasy VI
22
YEARS
Female
Complicated
Heterosexual
429 POSTS
Fin
Use your own eyes and see for yourself whose side I'm on!
[attr=class,lyric1]i've met someone who can accept me
[attr=class,lyric2] for who i am
[attr=class,bulk] Caius leaned against the railing, arms flat, head tilted in thought. He looked out at the glistening black water for a long time before he pulled himself upright again and extended a hand, summoning his dagger into it. Celes glanced at him in surprise, but it seemed he only wanted something to fidget with, slowly turning the blade between his fingers.
”I wish I had some answer that could make it alright,” he said. ”Some magic cure all tied to some evil monster we could kill, and all of a sudden, the world is right as rain again. I would be by your side for that fight in a heartbeat.” He smiled at her sheepishly and then went on.
”Unfortunately, that only works when the world’s in danger. But I think it’s a good first step, admitting to it.” Caius smiled at her and Celes smiled back. She didn’t have to do this alone, huh? It would have helped if she’d known what it was she was trying to do.
Celes snorted at his joke. Or at least, she thought it was a joke. ”You don’t have to puff me up,” she said. ”I don’t know what my goals even are. And I’m not sure if I’ve ever shot for the stars. I’ve just…”
She waved her hand indecisively.
”I did what I was told, at least until I didn’t. And then I made a few bad choices and the world was in ruin. After that, it was just a question of whether I’d waste away or die fighting.” She hummed to herself and leaned forward with her elbow on the railing and her chin in her palm. It was a dark night lit only by stars and colored lanterns. The hedges muffled the sounds of the city, leaving them in an illusion of silence. It felt almost safe here, perched on their pond bridge and hidden away amongst the flowers. Of course, it would all burn away at the slightest resistance. If soldiers came through or some mad god passed judgment from on high…
”You know, you’re not so bad at this. Dates, I mean.” She glanced at Caius and smirked faintly. ”You always see the best in people, and you’re not too shy to say so. You stand by everyone around you and...and…”
She sighed heavily. ”I don’t know what’s wrong with me.”
Celes pushed herself off the railing and turned around so she could lean her back against it instead. She propped one heel behind her, arms crossed, head tilted towards the sky. ”Every time I hear someone thinking the best of me like that, it makes me want to scream. I want to run away and start over and never speak to anyone ever again.” Celes reached up and twirled a ringlet of hair around her finger. ”I’m not a good person. I don’t have some big goal. I want to help people, but that’s more for myself than anything. I don’t know what to do without a sword in my hand.”
If it came to work that really helped, if it came to going back to that ruined world and devoting herself to rebuilding it, that wasn’t something she could do. She tried to imagine what she would have done if the forces of the universe hadn’t thought to pluck her out of space and land her here. With Kefka gone...If she’d really defeated him…
Then she would have disappeared, most likely. Maybe she’d have followed Locke around because she didn’t know what else to do. Maybe she would have slain monsters for a while and told herself it was to protect whatever villages still dotted their wastelands. But in the end, she’d have just disappeared, and every now and then, Terra or Edgar or someone would have wondered whatever happened to ex-general Celes Chere, but it wouldn’t come to anything because Celes was a woman made for fighting, a product of war, and without some battle to keep her head straight…
What did she have, really?
”Part of me wishes there really was some evil monster to fight,” she said with a dry smile. ”Some big evil monster, and then it would feel like I had something to do that meant something. I could gather people against it and we’d all have a reason to be there and everything would all make sense again.”
Celes shook her head. ”But that’s wrong, isn’t it? I told you. I’m not a good person.”