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year 5, quarter 3
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Post by Caius Dragelion on Apr 20, 2018 19:33:28 GMT -6
Was he ever going to get back?
It was a question that haunted him while he was travelling, a question that haunted him while he lied awake at night trying to sleep. It kept him up at night, even. That thought that he didn't belong here. He belonged with the Glaives, he belonged in Eos, he belonged at His Highness' side, being the protector, the Glaive, that he had sworn to be! His Highness had given him his power, he had given him a new lease on life when he was hitting a dead end... Given him companionship and a friend when he needed it the most. And what did he do with it? Nothing! Nothing except go back to the damned freelancer with no aims, no hopes and dreams like he used to be! He constantly felt sick, he constantly felt alone... The loneliness was the hardest part. Knowing that nobody in this world would be able to understand.
He walked this path, this world, this burden... And he walked it alone.
And all he could do was pray that one day... He would be able to see home again. But day by day, that hope grew dimmer. Did his world even exist anymore? That thought had come into his head recently... The fact that perhaps the world he came from had been sucked into the black hole he had entered as well...
And there was no longer a world to go back to.
Would he be stuck here forever? Alone, unable to speak to someone who could relate, someone who could understand? He didn't feel like he fit in while he walked this plane, didn't feel like he belonged... And he hated it. That feeling of non-belonging... He'd been able to stand it a long time ago. Back when nothing seemed to matter except for work. But now he'd found the Glaives... He was whole! He had a purpose! He had a reason to live, a reason to be, a reason to fight!
And it was gone! All gone!
The realization that it'd been a year had hit him the night before after he'd landed in Provo and decided to stay the night. As he'd walked into the bar, trying to drown it out, the drinks didn't help. The feelings only worsened as the numbing feelings of the drinks made him only feel more helpless. And the more helpless he felt, the more he was reminded of his predicament. He'd found himself ajourning to his room for the night...
And he'd broken down.
He had stayed strong all this time, all this last year, hoping, praying... But the reality of what he had lost had hit him like a truck. The reality that after a year... He was likely never going back. He had waited so long and hoped and prayed so hard, hoping that out there, some astral being would answer his prayers, and would bring him back to where he belonged...
He didn't want to be alone anymore. He didn't want to be lonely anymore. He didn't want to not belong anymore. All he could wish for was to be back where he belonged with the Glaives...
... His family...
They were his family. It didn't entirely hit him until that night. He had lost his real family a long time ago... They had become his new family when he had joined the Glaives. And now they were gone too.
He had lost his family all over again.
He had finally accepted, after spending so long trying to be strong... Spending so long trying to keep upbeat and keep moving forward... That his dream was not going to come true. And it was the hardest thing that he had ever done. Caius was not a man that cried, he hadn't shed a single tear in two years... The only time he could remember crying from the moment he had become a hunter was when he had joined the Kingsglaive. And yet... They were tears, yes. But they were tears of joy, tears of happiness. He had finally found where he had belonged and he felt it...
Now... The tears he felt trickling down his face carried nothing but absolute sorrow. He grieved that night, tried his best to drown himself in further drink but nothing could take the pain away. Nothing could take the heartache away. He could almost literally feel his heart breaking. Everything hurt. It was like the reality of how much damage had been done to his body over the years just finally set in. Everything hurt, everything ached, everything pained. And yet he couldn't find himself to care.
All he could feel, truly feel, was the pain in his heart.
He hadn't felt the pain of loss in so long, and as a child he hadn't been able to fully understand it and comprehend it to the extent that he could now... He tried to keep the facade of the stoic, tough mercenary he'd put up one more time... But he couldn't anymore. In private quarters, by himself, as alone as he ever could be... It broke. He broke.
He understood it now... And he hated it. He hated every bit of it and didn't know how he'd gone all those years without that companionship that he now lacked. And for a few select moments... He considered ending it. He had a sword nearby, he could end it all here... And perhaps one day, when the day was right, his companions would join him and his old family in the afterlife.
But he couldn't bring himself to do it.
What would his companions, his fellow Glaives say, knowing that he'd acted this way when things weren't going well? They'd never forgive him. Life was to live! And he'd spent all this time living that life for a cause, a reason... And now it was gone. That reason was gone but his life wasn't over. His life was empty, a void now...
But he could always fill that void somehow...
Right?
He... He didn't know. He didn't know if he could.
But he had to try. This, he knew. If he was going to be stuck here for the rest of his life... He needed to make sure that when he went to the great beyond and saw his companions again...
He wanted them to be proud. He wanted them to smile, he wanted them to laugh, he wanted to be able to tell stories of his exploits and what he had done. He wanted to be a man - if not a Glaive, then a man - that they could be proud of.
He would do the Glaives proud...
One way...
Or another.
--------------------------------------
The morning had come, and Caius Ignis Dragelion had found himself with a pounding headache. A groan had left him as he had left his bed with a serious hangover. Hours passed and the headache would begin to loosen, but the pain stayed. His heart was still heavy from the night before, but Caius' determination (and pure stubbornness) kept him going.
He hadn't found work, so that he needed to do. While for some reason a bit hesitant to put it on, he'd found himself able to put on the Glaives' jacket and head out. The young man would find his way toward the bulletin boards, hoping that perhaps something he could do had popped up there...
It hadn't been very long since Aerith's arrival into a new, strange world; in fact, in terms of common knowledge or sense, she found herself quite lost amidst the complexities of the land before her. Some things felt more familiar than others: sensations, perceptions -- she did not know what she was accustomed with already. In that manner, the flower girl found herself at more dead ends than not, unable to find a clear path for the journey ahead of her. That is, if one could call it such, given a journey would be difficult without any sort of goal in the end. Strange, isn't it?
Nevertheless, she never allowed herself to relent in her pursuit of understanding; occasional bad times never weighed down upon her too heavily. A simple pep talk was given before she stood back up and walked. For some reason, she found it exceptionally well to march onward, never stopping for long. Perhaps she had always been such a carefree person? If so, it certainly made her existence now much easier. It was quite fortunate to be a woman with a determination to move past current struggles and dilemmas.
Though that isn't to say that she had forgotten all of them. Many times in the night, as she laid on dirt roads staring at the expanding sky above, she found herself missing something. It was almost as if a presence by her side was not accounted for; that much was surely strange, given she could not recall whose presence it was that she missed so dearly. Yet evenings alone did little to ease her spirits, and as she rested alone night after night, she resolved herself that she would find some sort of companion to accompany on her days. Just for a little while, if nothing else.
With her appearance in Provo, a city well-known for its trade, Aerith decided to arbitrarily hire someone to join her adventure to the Dragoon's Tomb. Why, one could ask, would a woman like her have interest in such a strange relic? Well, she didn't have a ready answer; there simply seemed like something was calling out to her, a sort of voice reminiscent of something so painstakingly familiar that it laid upon the tip of her tongue. Yet no matter how much she tried -- and she had attempted several times already, she could not recall any memory nor moments that would explain why she was so attached to the idea of entering the ruin.
But sentimental reasons meant little, for the time being; right now, Aerith could simply say that she wanted to visit it for money. Gold? Treasures? Tombs held those sorts of things, didn't they? There was a part of her sympathetic to the poor individuals -- surely their soul dealt with many grave robbers beforehand. Yet perhaps if it was an amnesiac who needed some assistance, they'd be more willing to part with their treasures. At the very least, maybe there would be something worth unraveling there.
Unfortunately, such a dangerous task didn't appeal to many mercenaries or travelers. No matter her persistence, she was readily rejected one after another, after another. How depressing! She huffed her cheeks as her hands rested on her waist, attempting to look for someone who might be willing to accompany her.
It was there that someone caught her attention, beckoning to her. When Aerith drew closer, they spoke of a man who was far kinder and braver than others. He would be willing to accept her at a decent rate -- though Aerith's nose scrunched at the mention of money. But she thanked the traveler for their time, offered one of her flowers picked from the fields on her way here, and moved on after receiving a description.
As luck would have it, there wasn't much effort needed in finding him: there he stood, right in front of the bulletin board! Perhaps it was fate?
"Helloooooo?" The greeting extended in a sing-song manner, hands held behind her back along with her basket of belongings, upper body leaning forward to catch his gaze from the side. Emerald eyes brightened as she confirmed his appearance, lips curling into a bright grin. "Are you Caius? The mercenary? I've been looking for you."
She leaned back after her greeting, straightening her posture, but never allowing her sunny disposition to drop. One hand raised near her chest, gesturing to herself. "My name is Aerith. I need a bodyguard. I don't have a lot of money though..."
Her gaze went askew as her head tilted to the side. Her lips pursed as a finger rested on her cheek, imitating a thinking position, before an idea arrived. Immediately, previously half-lidded eyes opened wide once more, and she returned to him with a large smile. "... Oh, I know! How about one date?"
Post by Caius Dragelion on Apr 20, 2018 22:23:59 GMT -6
As Caius' brimming brown eyes scanned the bulletin board, he let out a soft, resigned exhale. Nothing that worked for a mercenary, really... Just requests to help with construction here and there, cleaning, yadda yadda... Not something that he could stick a blade into, to say the least. He despised having days where he didn't have any work. If he wasn't travelling to a place of work or travelling to a city where he was to look for work... Or if he wasn't on the job... And he wasn't just resting before the next one... Then he was wasting time. It was a mindset that had been burrowed into him when he was a hunter back in Eos. He had needed that mindset in order to survive.
With a crappy economy back then, Caius, back when he had been known as "Josh", had to do what was necessary and that included working at all times. There was very little time for luxury. Everything he did was based on work. Whether that was walking, running, fighting, travelling, training, eating, drinking, sleeping... Everything he did should be dedicated toward the job.
Perhaps he could afford to settle down a bit, but... He just never was able to will himself to. Old habits died hard, aye? Regardless, he was about to give up on the bulletin board and go to train somewhere... If he had no work set up, he could at least train some before he skipped town and went elsewhere to look for work, right? But before he could, a voice would stop him. Looking over, a woman would accost him, asking if his name was Caius. The woman seemed rather.. Sunny, to say the least.
"Yes. I am Caius" He spoke calmly as he would listen to her request. Arms folded, he listened as she stated that she needed a bodyguard, for whatever reason. She didn't give much detail past that, which wouldn't do. He would ask her for more information before she suddenly came out saying she didn't have much in the way of money...
But it was the date idea that caused his brows to lift quite a bit. "A date that I will pay for as well, no doubt" He sassed right back in a bit of dry humor. "Pass. I don't do people selling themselves off for gil. If I wanted that, I'd walk down the corner."
Still, the woman didn't seem to be that well off... And why would she come to a mercenary if she knew she couldn't pay? Was she trying to sucker him? No.. Something seemed off.
"And where exactly are you going where you need a bodyguard, Miss Aerith?"
His retort amused Aerith, corner of her lips quirking upward in a brief moment. Though his rejection was clear, she found that she didn't quite mind it. Most people dismissed her; such was true. However, his sarcasm seemed vaguely familiar, enough to stir some sort of sentimentality within her. It felt less cruel, less forthright -- it was simply one jest given for another. Had a scene like this happened before? Her gaze, though unmoving, almost seemed to look past Caius and into a hidden realm where her memories lied hidden.
Ultimately, she dismissed the notion and fixed herself to the real world once more.
"Not like that!" Aerith corrected him, a finger pointing as if it would emphasize her point. It was not as if she had been offended by the consideration - rather, Aerith was more than accustomed to knowing the desperation of those attempting to procure money into their homes. Still, it was fine if she was a little offended, right? After all, it was rude to infer something like that of a lady! "I'm not that kind of girl."
When he asked her where she was headed, her smile thinned -- not quite out of tension, but rather hiding the mischief that would have been revealed otherwise. She had no intentions of causing trouble for anyone -- it was simply curiosity, if nothing else. Perhaps her smile seemed more chesire-like than she would have wanted. "Promise not to leave if I say?" Her finger came to rest upon her lips, almost as if she was to divulge a secret. Would it seem enticing? Like something hidden that was not meant to be told? In truth, it was nothing of that sort. But that hardly stopped Aerith from putting on a show of sorts.
"I want to go to the Dragoon's Tomb." Her voice remained unwavering, never lacking conviction. She spoke the truth as she peered into his eyes; she was looking for any signs of hesitation. Her hands clasped together in front of her chest, almost prayer-like, hoping that Caius would be the mercenary not to abandon her in her time of need. "Not deep into it. Just to visit. It's the light. It's like it's calling..."
Post by Caius Dragelion on Apr 21, 2018 0:02:49 GMT -6
The grin that followed at her retort made it pretty clear that he was speaking in jest. It was a cheeky, wry, wide little grin. Despite his usually professional outlook to others, he still had a little bit of mischief in him. That mischief was in full display there as the grin seemed almost impish. Not malicious, at all... Just playful. Teasing. "Could have fooled me, trying to lead a man on like that knowing you couldn't pay" He teased back, the impish - yes, let's just call it impish for the time being - grin never once wavering.
He didn't seem to be serious, he didn't seem to be accusing. He seemed to just be having a little fun at the expense of her pride in relation to his responses. Not that she was making it hard to quip and sass her all over the place. Still, her expression seemed to change when he would ask his question. Was it a crime to know where exactly they wanted you to be bodyguard for? Places could be dangerous, you know... And his rates always depended on the level of danger.
"The Dragoon's Tomb, huh?" He would inquire, not seeming all that bothered by the location. "Dangerous sort of place. No wonder you wanted a bodyguard. Of course, the more dangerous the place, the steeper my fee... Have to cover for unforeseen risks, and being able to work back the resources I'll be spending to keep us alive... You know, the regular things."
She claimed that something in there was calling to her. And in that moment, he seemed to understand... Perhaps was she not of this world? She seemed to know little of this world, aside from some locales, didn't know that she had to pay for help like this... She was either trying to swindle him, lead him into a trap, or she was one of the few rumored people that had apparently popped into this world with no recollection of where they were from. As she clasped her hands together, he couldn't help but let out a sigh. He could emphasize. If there was something calling to him, with even the slightest chance he could return home... No matter how dangerous, he'd take it in a heartbeat. If this was a chance for her, then he'd help her if he could.
"... Alright. Just pay me later. I'll keep an eye out obviously, so no trying to skip out. But if you're broke, I'll just charge you an IOU until you can reasonably pay it" He spoke as he would pull out a book, writing something down and ripping out the page before handing it to her. "This is my fee. Dragoon's Tomb is dangerous, so I'd hope you would understand why it's a bit steeper than my usual. But as I said, you can pay it whenever you're able. I'm not hurting for funds in a serious matter, though I sincerely hope that if you take me up on this, you don't do so with the intention of skipping out on me" He spoke, his tone becoming serious as the topic turned to business. "I don't say that to be cruel. I'm just saying I gotta eat" He teased with a light smile.
"I don't usually do this, so consider yourself lucky" He teased again, not being able to help the light jab.
"I wasn't leading you on." His teases hardly bothered her - instead, it allowed her to reply coyly in return. In truth, she felt as if she missed this back-and-forth banter, which was surprising given she couldn't remember anyone who she would have conversed so freely with. Yet the emotion was so deeply ingrained that it took little for her to remember it, and for the time being, that desperate and little voice was sated by this camaraderie. How strange. "I told you, didn't I? I don't have money."
Was it a weak response? Maybe. But at least she was being truthful. It was hardly her fault if he inferred something beyond the norm from her speech. He couldn't pin the blame on her for assumptions! "A date can just be spending time together and talking." Her fingers removed themselves from their previously entangled position, now settling into a clap in front of her. Laughter, almost melodious in nature, escaped from her -- her head tilted a fraction to the side. "It's not my fault if your imagination goes wild."
In truth, Aerith would have expected Caius to cringe, to look away, to do anything that signified his nervousness. Instead, he simply spoke honestly and without little hesitation. Hm... This must be what a true professional is like. Though he was rather cheeky, he felt extremely dependable. Perhaps that was why the other traveler suggested him? He was the first mercenary she had come across that appeared hardly bothered by her request, simply answering it as if it were any other mission. Her eyes shined for a moment, respect flickering across them. The admiration only grew when he offered an deal: payment later. She was not quite so happy with how it seemed to arise out of pity or sympathy; but for such a dangerous place, she supposed she couldn't be picky.
"So you're going to watch me? Like... a Soldier." She had meant to say a spy or something along those lines, but Soldier fell from her lips so naturally that she almost wondered if she had said it many times before. It startled her for a second, eyes briefly widening, as her lips parted briefly. But they closed not a second after, head shaking along with her brown bangs. "... That's fine. Just promise you'll say hi instead of only watching."
Aerith reached out and grabbed the page from him, taking a glance at it and scrunching her face in return. That was... quite the amount. But what he said sounded reasonable: the Tomb was a dangerous location, and he planned to accompany her for no cost at the time. To add onto that, she hadn't even understood why she wanted to or for what reason -- she simply did. "I see... I can't really complain, then. I promise I'll pay you when I can."
Whenever that was, of course. She had no idea of what she could sell for money not any leads on how to gain any. Perhaps there were flowers she could tend to? She found herself rather attracted to them. Though she'd have to look for a location first... Oh well. That was a struggle for another day!
"Thank you, Caius." Her gratitude came easily and genuinely, smile no longer coy but pleasantly happy. She slipped the paper into her pocket for safe-keeping, eyes diverting into the distance. "I know I'm asking a lot, but... I think I need to go there."
She couldn't pinpoint why if he asked; she didn't understand how it called her. But nevertheless, she felt as if she could not resist its siren song. Was this a common occurrence here? Or was there simply something that drew her to the spiritual aspects of the world? There were too many questions to be answers, and no one but her lost memory had any explanation for the circumstance. Perhaps even she would not hold the answers. It was frustrating, really.
"Maybe we'll find something valuable along the way. Mercenaries have an eye for stuff like that, right?"
Post by Caius Dragelion on Apr 21, 2018 11:43:22 GMT -6
"Sure you weren't" He sassed right back, the grin still evident in that moment. The banter was something he didn't mind, it was something he was used to from home. It was... Kind of nice, really. He was happy that some things weren't entirely gone, though he did miss the companionship that his fellow Glaives had brought. He'd at one point spent most of his life alone, but now that he hadn't been alone anymore with them... He didn't think he could wholly do that anymore. Now it just hurt. But a life of a mercenary was a lonely one, which hurt, but it was something he'd grown to begin to accept. He didn't know if he would be a mercenary forever, to be honest, but where else did he have to go? Regardless, it was nice to be able to joke around more like this, it hadn't been something he had been able to do in some time but when the opportunity came up, it was like muscle memory had just kicked in and he had immediately shot the sass out of a cannon.
"People always say they have less money than they actually have" He joked, which wasn't actually untruthful but he was still just taking the piss out of her presently. His expression more or less said that, as he would lean against the side of the bulletin board with that cheeky grin still plastered across his face. There was mischief all over his tone of voice, and his expression. "As for the date... Well, they always say that too. Suddenly there's a full course meal involved" He spoke. "Or maybe I just like to treat a lady if I have that sort of care and affection toward them? You don't know me" He teased again, playfully sticking his tongue out at her in turn to indicate that bit of mischief. He couldn't help but begin to laugh after that though. Was his imagination running wild? Maybe. Or maybe she was trying to get out of how her approach had come off? "If I feel like taking you on a proper date, I'll let you know!" He would joke between bouts of laughter.
He didn't fear the Dragoon's Tomb. It was dangerous, but wasn't every job? For a man who had made a career out of taking on demons and creatures for jobs that placed him in way over his head just to be able to eat for a few days when the economy was in it's worst in a ruined world... This was basically another Saturday for him. His main concern was the costs of getting there and back, and the cost of what he'd be using to keep themselves alive should they run into anything. If he died, he died. He was a mercenary, he was probably going to die on a job eventually. That was something he'd accepted while he was a hunter, something he'd accepted while he was in the Kingsglaive, so at this point it was just part of the job as a mercenary for him.
Truthfully though, while he didn't tell her this, if they didn't really run into any trouble in her apparent brief visit to the Dragoon's Tomb, he was going to cut her fee dramatically anyway. There was no point in charging someone extra for no extra effort. The amount he was charging her was done with the idea that they would probably run into something nasty, so unless they somehow ran into something far nastier than even he was imagining, her fee wasn't going to increase. Instead it would most likely be dropped dramatically sine the danger potentially might not be as much as he was projecting.
Of course he didn't tell her this, as noted. He'd surprise her later if it came to it.
He nodded his head then as Aerith seemed amenable to the price. He did feel bad about charging her that much when she apparently had no money at the moment, but it was necessary. Imagine if he went to somewhere this dangerous, and lost money as a result? Especially if they ran into something super nasty and he had to expend quite a lot in resources just to get them out of there. His policy for escorts was that at all costs, the client's safety was of upmost importance. If he was going to be prioritizing Aerith's life over his own, he needed to charge as such to make up for the risks and the resources he'd likely be expending.
He would bow his head when she would say thanks. This was his job, after all. He supposed it was true too, he could find some treasures while he was there to offset the delay in payment. Would be nice. Alas, it was off to business.