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year 5, quarter 3
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Post by Caius Dragelion on Nov 27, 2019 14:30:08 GMT -6
Suppose this world isn't so terra-ble.
@tag Word Count: OOC: Caius doesn't know! Dialogue Color: 196fd1 Party Sprites Credit
"Would you believe it wasn't all that long ago?" Caius remarked with a small laugh. Believe it or not, it hadn't been all that long since their meeting at all. Even if it felt like forever. What felt like a year ago was maybe a few months at best. Time here was... Weird. "But it's good to see you again."
She asked if the Dragonblades were nearby, and he shook his head. "Just Vordun and I right now" He answered. "The rest of the Dragonblades are on jobs, or resting back in Torensten. Perhaps you'd like to check the place out sometime? We have a building now" He offered cheerfully. While it wasn't an extension of membership, or pressuring her to seek it, he figured he would at least offer for her to come take a tour of the place. "It's not much right now, but we're expanding as we go."
Cat Man meanwhile seemed to either be offended or completely indifferent to his mention of Spirans. His suddenly ripping up the fish and tossing it aside also seemed to indicate that maybe he had said something bad.
"Did I say something wrong?" He inquired toward the cat man, gingerly bowing his head. "My apologies if I have somehow wrought you offense. It was never my intention" Caius promised. Vordun meanwhile, had taken notice of the fact that the fish was left discarded. He'd begun bumbling past Caius as he apologized to the Ronso. "The Spirans are free men, if it was a wording issue. We're more of a family working toward common goals than anything. We all just want to see people safe and not come to harm. And a lot of folks are displaced from their worlds and only really have combat experience. It gives them a chance to find a place to belong and find their footing in this new world."
Of course Caius was wrong, but he didn't know the Ronso's feelings. How could he?
Meliadoul let out a sigh as things seemed to go crazy rather shortly after things started to appear that things would be going sideways. With all of Kimahri’s silence she could not help but feel an animosity beginning to grow out quickly between Caius and Kimahri. There was just something bubbling beneath the surface with him and Meliadoul was going to leave it well enough alone. She had seen that cold intensity in only a few people before. It was something she had learned to not bother with. All of this showed when he moved away from the both of them. Taking a few moments to clear her mind and she turned back t Caius.
Though she had to know that it was not the full truth that time had passed. This was something that she could not help but understand. Hearing that the Dragonblades were not nearby. This actually made her mind rest a little easier. As this made it so that she was certainly going to be able to beat them up with ease if needed. Yet it seemed that it would not be needed. Though she would not rest just in case.
“You guys actually have a base. That is impressive as most of the time people who claim to be mercenary groups are just glorified bandits with no base of operations. So that makes you a little more legitimate within my eyes.” She spoke as she moved her wary eyes toward Kimahri and then back toward Caius and his lizard. The lizard was happily gobbling down the food that had been tossed his way. Shaking her head she could not help but know that the fact it gobbled it down in a single motion was a little disconcerting should it turn out to be hostile.
Rubbing the side of her head she could not help but turn to look toward Kimahri once more. “Are you alright good Sir Kimahri? You seem agitated. If there is anything that I could do to help you. Please do not hesitate to ask me and I will do whatever I can do to help you.” She was speaking rather quickly and yet with conviction behind her words. A conviction that she would stand behind.
All sound in Kimahri's head is dulled by a squealing whine, threatening to overwhelm his senses. He closes his eyes and curls his brow, letting off a low growl; if Caius or Meliadoul took it improperly, it was because they were not familiar with his way of handling these types of problems.[break][break]
But this one, no... This one evoked something dreadful within the Ronso; something hideous and gross, a creature he has carried since the day Yuna destroyed the malign spirit of Yu Yevon and brought endless peace to Spira. The feelings of his duty fulfilled as a Summoner's guardian grappled violently for control over Kimahri's psyche, fighting back against the scars of trauma inflicted upon his heart and soul by that Guado heretic Seymour.[break][break]
"The Spirans are free men...More of a family... working toward common goals... Caius's words slowly transmogrify into an unintelligible slur of muffled noises. Kimahri's pupils glass over, indicative of his dissociation.[break][break]
Then, Meliadoul starts in with her own inquisitions, arguably staying true to her apparent visage as a noble paladin-type figure. "Are you alright good Sir Kimahri? You seem agitated—"[break][break]
Everything is out of control. The world spins, yet Kimahri remains firmly planted, his muscles solid and firm like stone. His pulse grows louder, fingers tensing around the shaft of his lance in a feeble attempt to ground himself in reason. Too much stimulus. Too many questions. Too many people trying to help.[break][break]
We all just want... People safe... Not come to harm...[break][break]
Where were you when the Ronso were butchered?
[break][break]
If there is anything that I could do to help you—
[break][break]
You can't help Kimahri.
[break][break]
Displaced from their worlds... Find a place to belong...[break][break]
There is no place for Kimahri to belong. Not in Spira, not here.
[break][break]
Please do not hesitate to ask me—
[break][break]
You can't help Kimahri!
[break][break]
Their footing...[break][break]
Kimahri is the last of Ronso! Kimahri have no footing left![break][break]
—And I will do whatever I can do to help you.
[break][break]
YOU CAN'T HELP KIMAHRI!
[break][break]
SHUNK. Without even knowing it, Kimahri had rammed the foot of his spear deep into the wet sand, hoping the simulation of stabbing something would extinguish the voices that gnawed and chewed on his very mind like starving hyenas desperate for table scraps. When he came to, his chest grew and shrank with hurried effort, every breath coarse and labored as if he just got finished running an entire marathon. Then, a mixture of aggravation and regret floods the cat-man's body with an even greater feeling of shame the two humans would never get the privilege to see, based on how utterly inflexible his posture had been the whole time.[break][break]
Kimahri reflected on his earlier gesture. Was he trying to silence the voices, or kill the dark impulse to, instead, run these ignorant primates through for their grating displays of rosy-colored camaraderie and altruism? The thought of it rattles him to the core, which only worsened his outlook on things as it stood. Regardless of their beneficent intentions, both Caius and Meliadoul were unintentionally demonstrating the cobra effect in full: by attempting to fix a perceived problem, they were only making it even worse.[break][break]
Eventually, Kimahri would just bow his head and let off a weary sigh. "What Kimahri want is gone. What Kimahri want, Kimahri cannot have." The answer is intentionally cryptic, but absent of any real hostility or spitefulness. He still refuses to face the pair of humans. Unsure of how to properly voice his concerns, though, the Ronso took a blind stab and merely shook his head in disappointment for himself. "Kimahri did not want this." He admits, referring to their current exchange of words.[break][break]
Well it was an easy conclusion to make at this point that something was definitely wrong with Catmahri. Their offers to help, to assist, to aid in some way, shape or form seemed to fall on deaf ears for what felt like forever. He didn't answer, but by his body language... It was pretty clear something was there, something was forming. Tension drew in Caius' subconsciousness the longer this awkward silence went, and he gingerly dropped his arm as it moved to the side, his hand unconsciously moving its position to where he could summon his weapon within the quickest of seconds and defend himself if need be. It was nothing against Kimahri or anything about his character that seemed untrustworthy. But Caius didn't survive this long by being unprepared when he could sense trouble.
The sound of the spear hitting the sand didn't prompt Caius to draw his weapon, not just yet. He remained calm, collected, waiting to see what the large cat man would do. But instead, he just spoke. Said that what he wanted was gone, what he wanted he could not have.
His arm very, very slowly dropped. But Caius remained on his guard as he responded, trying to piece together the short and vague answer that Kimahri had given.
"I know not what you speak of. But if you speak of being here, in this world away from what you knew... I mean, I don't think anybody did" Caius spoke up, taking a stab in the dark at the meaning of his words. There wasn't much else Caius could do except play the guessing game in this case. That was all the large cat man had given them the ability to do.
But some part of him still got the impression they were still in danger. Could be paranoia... Could be instinct.
Meliadoul could not help but feel that things were just going south faster and faster inside of the conversation. She was certain that things were about to go sideways and she felt her entire body tense up. All that she was doing was wishing to keep the town safe from any aggressors and yet it seemed that all she was doing was about to endanger them all with Kimahri. As his spear was jammed down into the sand, she instinctively moved her sword hand onto the hilt of her blade. There was something mechanical about it as she had this practiced and drilled into her brain.
Hearing Kimhari’s words come out as she finally could see the whole thing that she was not doing anything good in the current situation. Closing her eyes, she took in a deep breath and released it. Pulling her hand away from the sword hilt once more. “None of us wanted to be here Sir Kimahri. Yet we are here. I came here against my own will but I have done what I could to forge out my own place.”
There was much that she was going to say and yet she closed her eyes again. She was awaiting what Caius would say and do before she decided to come up with another course of action. Hearing that he was not going to do anything she was quite happy with it all. A smile crossed her lips as she could not help herself but allow her mind relax. “I think we can just let things be then. Sir Kimahri I apologize for coming and bothering you while you are but wishing to get some food and water. I would however would suggest finding a way to boil the water before you try and drink it from any of the pools and not the ocean here. If you should require a place to stay warm there is a family that if you pay coin, they allow any to bed inside their second barn. At least it would be a place to be warm and safe for an evening should you need it.”
A mixture of anguish and frustration prevents Kimahri from seeing the value within their offers to help. In trying to alleviate his pain, as anyone capable of sympathy might, both Caius and Meliadoul were unknowingly twisting the proverbial knife even further into his heart, thus worsening his mental condition. Even without moving a muscle, the Ronso could sense their anticipation for trouble; they could give him the benefit of the doubt all they wished, but the man-cat knew better than to trust any human at face value.[break][break]
Narrow-sighted were the observations of these humans: though they looked with their eyes, they could not truly see what perturbed Kimahri. It was a matter of intuition, to be able to recognize the suffering and turmoil within another, but to fully grasp the depths to which their sorrow stretched required another, one who had experienced something equally painful. They do not know what it means to be the last of their kind, to be faced with the extinction of their entire way of living, their way of being.[break][break]
For all intents and purposes, the fact that this was not Spira was the least of Kimahri's concerns.[break][break]
"Kimahri not want help. Kimahri want to be left alone." The Ronso warrior's words are pointed and harsh, but he refuses to say any further on the subject. Lifting his spear out of the sand, the big blue beast-man simply swiveled until his back faced the knight and her dragon tamer compatriot, then began to walk away in a tense and hurried gait.[break][break]
Only the touch of soft white sand and the awkward silence between himself and the others gave Kimahri's troubled spirit a measure of comfort against the voices that threatened to bury his reason beneath the swelling anger within. The further he walked, the lighter his chest and shoulders felt. It was ironic; though he wished to be open with his feelings and allow others into his life, Kimahri simply could not muster the courage to be true to himself. But even if he had been able to, would they have understood, truly? The probability was low, he presumed.[break][break]
The Spirans that belonged to the dragon tamer's camp were better off without being burdened by relics of the distant past. Kimahri was but a memory of a memory, without substance or purpose, very like the pyreflies that shimmered and swirled over the waters of the Moonflow. To think that Caius or Meliadoul were certain he would be responsive to the prospect of encountering fellows from his own world was impertinent at worst, yet grossly misinformed at best.[break][break]
The two of them had done their best to gently comfort Kimahri, but it seemed that the giant cat had gone too far into his own misery to hear a word that they were saying, for the most part. Kimahri's sharp response to the offers of support and advice caused Caius to furrow a brow in annoyance. Caius didn't care that much about the slight on himself, but all Meliadoul had done was try to apologize and give him some advice on how to better survive here, and in comfort. And all the cat man seemed interested in was wallowing in self pity. Proclaiming he didn't want nor need help as he stormed off like a giant tantrum throwing baby. It was rude, honestly. She was just trying to help. He didn't need to be like that.
Caius would not stop him from leaving. He was a grown man - cat - after all. But not without some rather pointed words.
"It sounds more like Kimahri is too busy wallowing in self pity to accept help, or do anything except mope" Caius remarked bluntly, directly to Kimahri as he stared at his back. "I sympathize with Kimahri's plight, whatever that may be. But there are things that I have learned in this world... You can either mope around by yourself until a monster comes and off you, or you can get out there and move forward. So I'd suggest Kimahri ask himself a question... Would Kimahri rather mope and wallow in self pity, or would he rather do something about his situation? Because there's a whole world out there that could use a Kimahri, and there are people offering their hands to Kimahri if he needs them. If he can see more than two feet and actually look."
He took a deep breath, wondering for a moment if he had been too harsh. But he also knew that most likely, it was the best chance of helping Kimahri. Or it'd just piss him off. Caius was prepared for either possibility, really.
But his tone did soften a little when he followed up.
"I'll be honest with you, big man. It sounds like you're just surviving instead of living. Things suck... Trust me, I understand that well enough. But life goes on. We gotta do the same. We were brought here for a reason. Might as well find that reason."
Meliadoul would of much prefer to stay away from stuff like this. All of these types of situations were disliked by her. More because it would continue to remind her about the past that she would prefer to just continue to the future. All of her actions had only seemed to make Kimahri upset and angry about pretty much anything that was bothering him. She wished that she could be there to try and assist him inside of all his own worries.
Pulling herself a little back from the pair she wanted to make certain that there was no ill will at all anymore. “Hey do not call someone out on things like that Caius. Everyone has their own reasons for being here and we are not here to try and hurt others. We are here to help others who are as confused as we were when we arrived here. I mean my first day here I attacked a poor man because I thought he was a bandit.”
She could not help but speak out after he spoke out toward Caius. Meliadoul did not like to confront someone in such a manner and yet his words seemed to be rather hateful and hurtful. Despite her words she listened to him continue along with his train of thought. There were several thoughts running through her mind about all of this. Taking several breaths to keep her mind calm she allowed him to just go along and speak out letting his mind go away.
“” I do agree with that last little bit. We are all here for a reason and why it is. We need to find our reason. My reason has been to be here and help people from bandits. I can not dare to say what your reason for being here could be Sir Kimahri. I just hope that you find it rather quickly and I will only be here to offer you a place to rest your head should you need it.” She spoke softly but with the purpose that she could not help but understand it all.
Self pity? Kimahri's grip over his spear tightened once again as rage filled his tendons and muscles. The dragon rider speaks harshly, criticizes the Ronso of matters he does not understand, claiming that his refusal to accept the help of humans is driven by a childish impulse to mope and complain. The human has eyes, but cannot truly see into the depths of the man-cat's anguish. He cannot comprehend why he feels this way, yet apathetically insists that his reasons are nevertheless invalid.[break][break]
Even as Meliadoul steps forth to intervene on her male counterpart's barbed commentary, Kimahri remains firm and rigid upon the Pale Coast's sandy white beaches. His fury swells, then fades, ebbs and flows, just like the edges of the ocean that hissed and whirled their caps of sea foam hither and thither. The conflict within his heart refuses to dissipate, but the humans were merely stoking the fire as it grew ever hotter.[break][break]
But Kimahri would not allow Caius to walk away from this encounter without a little context. He was owed that much for being so impudent as to believe the pantherine warrior was simply acting out.[break][break]
"Kimahri is last living Ronso," He reveals with a coarse sigh. "Kimahri's people were butchered. Their blood lies frozen beneath the snow forever. There are no others like Kimahri." He glares back over his broad, muscular shoulder one last time, letting Caius and Meliadoul see for themselves the weight of his convictions emanating from deep within those sharp, yellow eyes. "Kimahri can do nothing but survive now."[break][break]
There was nothing more to say on the issue. His efforts to feed himself went spoiled, and now Kimahri was once again forced to confront the demons of his past and grapple with the bitter truth, that he was the only living survivor of his kind. To ease the pain with temptations of comfort and convenience did nothing to hide this awful reality, nor make it any easier to cope with, and their repeated efforts to convince the Ronso warrior otherwise only served as a point of annoyance for him.[break][break]
"The Spirans have no more need for Kimahri." Whether Caius believed Kimahri was irrelevant -- the underlying facts remained the same. He served his time with Lady Yuna as her guardian, and fulfilled his duty to see Sin destroyed. He served his purpose. They were better off without being near a relic of the past. "Kimahri will find a way. Kimahri always does."[break][break]
With one final breath, the spearman pushed forward into a slow walk in the direction he had chosen earlier and terminated all conscious thought on the other two people, leaving them to process all that had occurred at their leisure. He needed to find a quieter spot to capture his meal for the afternoon, and Kimahri would have to cover even more ground if he wanted the humans to actually get the message and leave him alone. Or, perhaps he needed the space to offer a prayer of remembrance for his fallen brothers and sisters, now that Caius had so mercilessly dug up these awful memories again.[break][break]
Kimahri didn't know what he wanted anymore, except to just get away from everyone.
The last of his kind, he said. The Spirans didn't need him anymore. There are no others like Kimahri. Well, there were no others like Caius anymore either, he'd seen a good deal of them cut down. And the only person to come remotely close tried to kill him. But he wasn't wasting his life because of it. Still, it didn't seem like there was any reasoning with the Ronso. Caius meant well. Sure, he had been a little harsh. But all he wanted was for the Ronso to try. Try to embrace the life that he had here, as even if his life in Spira was over and things didn't end so well when he left his world... That didn't mean he couldn't try to build something new here. Unfortunately, it didn't seem like anything he said was going to even reach him now, as he kept walking without stopping to let them speak back to him. Caius didn't even know if his words would reach Kimahri if he spoke now.
But stubborn Caius decided to try regardless.
"Lucians have no need for Caius. Caius found new purpose. Kimahri find new purpose. Kimahri live."
It was short, sweet and to the point. He had no clue if Kimahri heard a word he was saying, but it was worth a try. He wished he could do more. The Ronso might have been rather rude - Caius wouldn't have been as stern with his attempt to help otherwise - but he still hoped he would find his way, and find his light within the darkness. Alas, there was nothing he could do now. He let out a sigh as he turned to Meliadoul.
"My apologies you had to see me speak harshly" He spoke softly in turn. Regret was clear in his voice. "I wasn't sure what else was going to work. I wish there was more I could have done."
