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year 5, quarter 3
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The Wanderwood is almost picturesque. A calm stream bubbles by trees casting shade upon soft, moss-and-dirt covered ground. Verdant greenery as far as the eye can see. It's still mid-day, and a mixture of mildew, warm sun, and a light cooling breeze filters through the little pond-slash-island that's developed in a clearing. Cool fresh water, good enough to drink. A large twisting vine-covered tree keeps off the sun and ensures a damp nesting grounds for anything making it's home.
Or, you know, laying out in a collection of leaves, sticks, moss, and general wet greenery that looks like some eco-obsessed magpie decided to move in. In the center of this lays a woman barely into her twenties. Greased up raven-black hair is now in a messy tossle rather than it's usual slicked-back glory. Skin that looks like it's never touched the sun is marked by sharp features, dark lipstick, and a purple tattoo that may as well scream 'gang-banger' to anyone from the lower sections of Midgar. That matching-hued fur-lined coat only adds to the impression, dark suit beneath now stained with detritus from the forest.
The young woman blinks twice, pale blue eyes stare up. Her nose sniffs. Air. Clean air. Sunlight, birds chirping. The smell of nature. City-slicker she is, Umbrella the Turk doesn't recognize the scent at first. She tries to get up. Big mistake. A pained groan escapes the operative as a lightning bolt of pain works it's way from head to limbs. Sweat breaks from her forehead.
She decides to stay still. Blink blink blink. Dizzy from the pain, she leans into her training on instinct. Breath in, breath out. In and out and again. After five minutes of this she can finally focus enough to take stock of things. One hand feels her chest. Still beating, there's no holes in her that she can feel, and she has all of her clothes on.
That's a start. Umbrella decides it's not Monday Morning Hangover Funday. More like 'got dumped in the forest after a botched mission'. Dark lips smile. Placid blue eyes shimmer. She wonders what Big Brothers Rude and Reno are doing.
A few more calming exercises, and she /thinks/. It's a forest. Fingers rub at grass and twig. Definitely forest. She should have been...Kalm? It was Kalm right? The man skimming off the top of the Company's accounts. Another bolt of pain through her head. Nngh. Her memory is fuzzy and thoughts hard to grasp.
Buzzing fills Umbrella's ears. Her body goes tense. She reaches for her namesake weapon. Nothing. Finally, she tilts her head despite it making her vision swim. Oh. There it is. Just out of reach. Behind the yellow-orange skullfaced dozen or so bugs bouncing up and down.
"...Huh?" The Turk's mind just sort of shuts down in confusion. Skullfaced insects! In the next second, she's covered in the bouncey little jerks.
Now most people would scream. Umbrella is missing a few too many screws in her skulls for that. No, her first thought is that her suit is now being covered in oglop goop.
"Get off of me before I boil you all alive and feed you to alleyway cats." Comes her threat with utter seriousness and a quiet growl to it. Insects will understand a growl, right?
They must. All twelve oglops peer down at her. Once can almost see a look of unimpressed annoyance in their beady eyes. They turn around at once. Backsides wiggle.
The Turk, deadly assassin, thief, and spook that's always with a trick up her sleeve is not prepared for the utter /cloud/ of all natural concentrated oglop oil straight from the tap.
Thankfully she's turned her head, as the scream-retching can be heard throughout half the forest. Someone's having a bad morning.
Caius hadn't expected to find this grotto, but here it was. He'd heard rumors of the discovery of some kind of ancient forest and had gone to investigate himself, his explorative nature taking over... But there was something about it that he wasn't expecting. This grotto. He didn't know how to explain it. But something about it made it clear to him that it was a safe place. While his shoulders remained uptight as he and the blue Fire Drake moved through the forest, Some sort of creature with a bob on its head flew past the trees, but Caius hadn't had a chance to get a good look at it. It was the same one he had seen earlier while exploring this wood, just before the weird smelly guy had interrupted his rest. Now curious about what sort of creatures were in this wood if they weren't trying to eat him, he found himself following, trying his best to keep up with the little red bob he could see between the branches, though he was never able to figure out just what was behind it.
Perhaps it was something planning to lure him in to use for dinner? Or maybe, even with how safe this forest felt... He was just a little too paranoid. To be fair, the last time he had found a forest he didn't know, it conjured illusions and tried to kill him. So it wasn't hard to blame Caius for being just a little on edge.
But then the creature disappeared. Caius growled low in frustration. It would be a pain for them to find their way out of the forest again now. He cussed under his breath, and Vordun let out a snort that erupted steam from his nostrils in turn as Caius seemed to decide that all they could really do was just... Keep going, he supposed? That was about all they could do. They were here to explore, after all. Getting out of here could come later, and worst case scenario... They could try and fly out from under the trees. It wouldn't be easy, but it would make for a good contingency plan if it became necessary.
Brushing long blonde hair from his face, he turned toward the blue-scaled Fire Drake, who was growling at something. Vordun was just a bit bigger than the largest of horses, so if something had set him off, Caius was not taking any chances. Caius' weapon materialized in his hand, a longsword with a gap at the tip of the blade. But he didn't see anything... Not yet anyway. Vordun let out a roar as he charged forward, and Caius ran after him. It was there that Caius noticed the bouncing. Some kind of... Insects? They were bouncy things, for sure. It seemed they had most likely been bouncing on Vordun's scales, annoying the lizard. Vordun chased them, but didn't stop even when the scream resounded nearby. Caius stopped, eyes wide as he looked around... Until his gaze moved to the nest nearby. But the scream didn't deter Vordun, who seemed focused solely on the annoying creatures. Caius climbed up to go after him, and all they found were... More of them. Hundreds of them.
Which annoyed Vordun sufficiently to suddenly breathe a jet of flames at the creatures, narrowly missing the human form laying in their nest. What oglops weren't roasted would bounce off in fear. Caius let out a sigh as he placed a hand on Vordun's head. "Stop" Caius commanded. "That's enough. You've done enough" He told the drake in a calm tone, the drake who then snorted steam from his nostrils but otherwise complied. It was there that Caius saw the human form. He hadn't noticed them at first with the weird oily subtance all over them, that also happened to be all over the nest.
"You look rather large for an insect" He commented dryly.
Truly, Umbrella's world is an abyss of oily horrible bugness. She's stuck in the sheer /essence/ of oglop. Her head spins. Her nostrils are quietly begging to die. The young woman can feel the slow death of a well pressed suit. Her mental calculus briefly considers pulling out a spring-razor trap.
A few dozen pieces of bone-shredding metal is slowly winning the war on her current options. Thus it is that when a large gout of flame incinerates three-quarters of the buggy jerks, the Turk feels relief creeping into her heart. The fact that one of her long-coat sleeves is blackened now and a few greasy pieces of hair are now mildly on fire is a relief in the grand scheme of things. Fire is something she understands. Familiar. Comforting, almost.
A voice rings out. Dark lips quirk upwards. A human voice. Calm. Dry humor. With a groan Umbrella sits up. Pale blues with their mercury placidity scan first surroundings, then man. She takes her namesake, grips the snake on it's end, one thumb rubbing off a bit of dirt.
Hello, old friend.
Her other hand reaches up and pinches out the lightly smoldering hair bits. The sting distracts from the lingering horror of insects. Her stomach, now empty, churns uncomfortably. Umbrella mostly looks green in the gills right about now. And very, /very/ lost.
"I think I have bug-juice stuck in my soul right now, Mister, so maybe I am one." She responds, tone replete with dull misery. Not really apathy. She's still human, being bug blasted is /awful/. But notable.
Umbrella is already glancing over Caius with pale blue eyes that are more cracked, unhappy mirrors than still mercury as is the norm. They lose none of their pierce as she fights the insectoid hangover, attempting to read the man as she habitually does.
A good spook always plans to kill anyone they meet, just in case. Turks are great spooks.
Though one side glance ends the deep unblinking stare. Sharp brows rise as the horse-sized firedrake is looked over.
There's a single word written on her face. 'What?'. A pale finger points at Vordun.
"Thank you for the help, Mister. Are the bugs here hallucinogenic? Because I'm seeing dragons right now. I didn't party /that/ hard last night." Pause.
"Also, why am I in a forest? Are we near Kalm? Who are you? Where are the nearest dry cleaners and shower?" Shudder.
Caius was quickly bombarded by questions, and considering they were talking nonsense about some place he didn't recognize, either she was an offworlder, or she was just intoxicated from whatever the bugs had sprayed her with. Especially when she indicated she must be hallucinating at the sight of Vordun. Caius nodded curtly as he reached over to help her to her feet. He looks her in the eyes. He knew that look. How many times had he seen that look? He had seen it recently even. But most importantly he had grown up knowing that look. To say the woman was guarded was an understatement. But he did his best to rapid fire her questions with answers of his own.
"Vordun" He spoke first, referring to the drake. "One who just saved you from those spooky bouncy creatures" He joked dryly. "I don't think they're hallucinogenic, but I'm not the one that was sprayed with whatever that is on you, so you tell me."
"You're in a forest because you're in a forest. I don't know what a Kalm is. I'm a travelling mercenary. Showers are... Torensten. Fair ways from here so you've got quite a walk ahead of you - unless you would prefer I throw you in the nearest lake if that would count."
Caius let out a breath, but seemed to regret it when he got a whiff of the oil. With that, he stepped down from the nest. The sooner they got out of here the better. "I was exploring the Wanderwood when these things annoyed Vordun into giving chase. And then you started screaming, or I assume that was your screaming. So now we're here. With burning oil and charred... Whatever the hell those things are."
He shrugged in turn. Well, there was many things he could say about all this. But "boring" was not a way to describe it at least.
"You got a name? Or should I find a bug-based pun to use?" His dry wit continued, though his expression remained mostly neutral and his tone calm and casual.
Her questions get answers, but it only increases her confusion. Caius offers her a hand up. She stiffens on instinct. One more long up and down glance. Mmm. Pushing through what feels like molasses to think, she runs herself through the situation and her available information.
The young woman doesn't relax, even as she's helped up. Umbrella even leans on the man a little. She's unsteady on her feet, tip of her namesake used like a cane. The Turk is vulnerable near an unknown man with a powerful flame-spitting beast within a forest she's never seen and being told about a city she's never heard of with no clue how she got where she is.
For someone who runs on predictions, planning, and exploiting others, this is the universe on its head. /She/ is the one who should be controlling the situation, or at least ahead of the game. Embarrassment wars with that confusion. A small scowl begins to develop.
At the very least it seems like her blonde tall hero and dragon friend aren't robbing, incinerating, or trying to pull any schemes. It's the one bright spot right now. A deep breath, and the young woman forces herself to calm. Priorities. At least she has a direction. Get cleaned up, get some rest, contact the Company and gather information.
It's the start of a plan. Ducks in her head now somewhat less chaotic, some of that tension eases out. The scowl fades. And the pounding in her head's dulling at least. Blue eyes turn to brown, the corners of her mouth quirk.
"I'd ask where you got the dragon, but if you told everyone that they'd be in the corner petshop by now. Impressive, though, Mister. You must be something to earn a myth's loyalty." Her interest is piqued in the blonde. Eyes sparkle a little in humor.
"Knowing my luck if you tossed me in I'd encounter the great glitter-squirting octopi of the forest."
Hmmm. She nods to Caius as names come up.
"Call me Amy. Amy the Army Girl. Just not bug-chomper, okay? Who is my knight in shining armor?" A quirked brow, and she falls in with him. She'll try to step a bit behind. Just in case she needs a convenient meat shield.
"I'll buy you drinks for the rescue. Pockets are a little light right now. ...I think my wallet's missing actually. What I'm saying is I will owe you if you get me out of here in one piece."
Keeping in mind that look they'd had not long ago that he knew oh so well from his own world, Caius helped her up when she took his hand. Though he began to think when she brought up that he had brought up a myth's loyalty. He looked to Vordun, and then back to her, and then he slowly shook his head to the remark about people grabbing them from pet stores.
"Somehow I doubt that" He responded curtly. "But I think I understand your situation now."
Not enough to trust her, but enough to help him know what to do. He would pull out a map and hand it to her. "Alright, Amy the Army Girl..." He trailed off, not entirely believing her naming scheme but just letting it go. "Here's where we are" He spoke up, pointing to the Wanderwood on the map, labelled by his own ink. "And over here... Is Torensten. As well as Provo and Sonora, different cities with vastly different levels of technology and upbringing. As you can tell, there is no Kalm in sight" He pointed out. "Which means most likely, seeing as you think dragons are a myth... You're an offworlder. To explain in short, you're in Serentestra. In what is probably a completely different world from your own, much like... Well, almost everybody who ends up here, to be honest. And you probably won't go home anytime soon. Not impossible, but I'd begin lining up some work here just in case you're here for awhile."
Putting the map away, he let out a sigh. He didn't know if that was too blunt, but he'd given this explanation so many times that he was trying to figure out how to make it quick and easy. Quick, easy and painless. But it never seemed to get any easier.
"My apologies if this seems shocking or far-fetched" He remarked, studying her face. "My name is Caius. I'm a mercenary who works out of Torensten" He introduced. "Suppose the least I can do is get you to a city that resembles somewhere you're used to. No worries on the drinks. I'm not taking money from someone who's short it when they're going to need it" He pointed out, shaking his head. "Would be bad form. Was just bugs anyway."
Out comes that map. One pale hand goes fishing inside of that purple coat. After some suspicious shuffle of pockets and way too much metal, she digs out a cell phone. Unbranded, but a high end covert ops Shinra model. Flicking it open, she snaps a few pictures.
She’s glad she pushed for the HD model. A few finger swipes on the thing and she has a GIS scan running. Then her eyes track back to the man explaining. Phone back in pocket, she runs her fingers through her hair again. Leaning back on one heel, both brows slowly rise upwards.
Silence. Utter silence after the explanation. She’s not even bothering hiding her feelings on this one: Umbrella is looking at Caius as though he’d suddenly sprouted a second head that was giving an off-main-street version of Loveless. With accompanying vocals by screeching courls.
She has to work her mouth several times before she can get something out that isn’t plain rude. A Turk is a professional. She has a reputation and standards to keep!
So rather than calling him a delusional idiot, she lets out a fake cough, taps one foot of her now dirty dress shoes on the other, and gives him a good four minutes of staring down. Looking for signs of falsehood, of this all being some sick joke, of some con or scheme.
Caius reads to Umbrella as being the shockingly honest type. The blunt delivery attests to that, as did his saving her only to turn around and not take her up on payment. She doesn’t want to believe it, of course. Just thinking of the implications is bringing that headache back. Things get fuzzier every time. Her head gets the broad strokes, but memory is hazy.
“You’re not trying to pull a fast one. You at least believe in what you say. That map of yours looks real. The geography makes sense. And you deliver that as if you’ve done it before. No hesitation, no stumbling words, nothing.” She sighs.
“I don’t like it, but until I’m in civilization and can confirm everything I have to believe you. For now this is reality. Acting rash or calling you ‘liar liar liar’ is going to be counterproductive.” It is far, far too consistent. “I was betting on soldier, but soldier-for-hire works. …I don’t mean to be rude, but I’ve never met a soldier that turns down free drinks. It’s a little weird.” A pause. “Let’s get moving before it gets dark out here. I’d like to avoid hungry monsters coming out to chomp on our fingers.”
Umbrella over her shoulder, she takes one more look at her phone to double check the map, then out comes a compass. After a second to orient herself, eyes warily watch ahead as she moves out.
After a few minutes of walking, she speaks again. “Hey. Question for you Mister Caius. Why’d you save me if you’re not getting something out of it?” The question is genuine. She really doesn’t get it, and wants to know.
What the hell was that thing? Caius stared curiously at the tiny thing she was using to take snaps of the map. That was the strangest looking camera he'd ever seen. He'd played with a camera once back on the farm, so he recognized the flash. But despite being from Eos, Caius did not recognize a cell phone straight off. There hadn't been cell phone service since long before he'd become an adult.
Caius expected the staring when he told her. He wasn't surprised by he, and he was used to it by now. It was always him greeting these off-worlders and he had no clue why. So he just stared back. With no change in his expression, no indication of emotion or what he was thinking. He just stared blank-faced at her until she chose to "believe" him for the time being. He'd shown her the map first up as a precaution for this, but apparently the map and noting the reason why he came to this conclusion weren't practical enough for her to believe him. Suppose it wasn't that easy after all.
Either way, she'd chosen to play along with this for the time being, so it seemed he would be escorting her after all. Though he couldn't help but smirk lightly in amusement at her remarks that he seemed to have done this before. "I seem to have a knack for finding people soon after they show up here. Way too often" He quipped dryly.
Well at least she was honest. Even if it was weird hearing her say that it would be counterproductive to call him on his crap.
“I was betting on soldier, but soldier-for-hire works. …I don’t mean to be rude, but I’ve never met a soldier that turns down free drinks. It’s a little weird" She said and Caius casually shrugged in turn. "Trying to shake down money from someone who just got here is stupidly impractical" He commented. "It's almost impossible to help someone in the right direction if they think you're just trying to swindle them for money". He left it at that unless she asked further.
Either way, it seemed they would be on their way. Caius began walking. Now that it was dark, he needed a good clear view of where they were going before he and Vordun could take flight. So they needed to find the outskirts of the forest first. The woman, "Amy" spoke up, asking a question about why he saved her. He turned his head slightly to look at her.
"I didn't" He responded bluntly, cocking his head toward Vordun. "He did. They annoyed him."
Vordun snorted steam from his nostrils, as if remembering the stupid bugs.
Caius figured he might as well ask a question back. "Just so I know where I'm taking you, tell me a little of where you're from. At least enough for me to know where you would be best suited. Not that I have any plans of dropping you in a hick town with no tech since you've got that gadget with you."
One hand goes to Umbrella’s chest. She fakes sympathy quite openly. Eyes closed, shaken head mournfully.
“My condolences. Having to clear up lost idiots must get tiring every other Monday. You should start a travel agency.” She motions to Vordun.
“Caius-chan’s Dragonflight Vacations. See the world from atop the finest of sentient flamethrowers. Find new and interesting creatures that only might want to murder you.” Truly Umbrella is a saleswoman. Truly.
Her head tilts though when the issue of swindling newcomers comes up. She doesn’t /say/ anything. Instead she mentally jots that down. So he won’t even take advantage when there’s little to lose? More and more her quip about a knight in shining armor is getting solidified in her head.
She has absolutely zero doubt he’s dangerous. The man gives off the impression of a fighter to someone used to sizing up people. But that kind streak is a weakness in Umbrella’s mind. Something she can use if it came to it. Or if the opportunity arose.
‘You need some swindling lessons if /that’s/ what you think, Mister Caius’ Ponders Umbrella to herself.
Vordun really is the hero of the day, isn’t he? The woman has taken to lightly spinning her namesake on one finger casually as they walk. A raised brow and glance to the scaled legend.
“Mister Vordun, I wholeheartedly agree with applying fire to those smelly, oily, skull-faced little vermin. Good job. Since you’re my hero and Mister Caius isn’t one for night life, how about you and I get drinks? I’m sure we can find you a pretty girl dragon to take out to dinner. You’ve earned it.” She actually laughs. Umbrella likes the dragon, and though she wouldn’t admit it, saying something ridiculous to the scaley murder machine is fun.
For a half second she almost feels like something other than a half-broken knife in Shinra’s hand. Only that long though. Her training reasserts itself, as do her long gang-banging career. Someone should’ve gotten Umbrella some help a long time ago. Too bad the Company likes their Jacqueline the Rippette just fine.
But the flash of humanity is there. The curious little girl who would treat the Honeybee Inn’s workers with hugs and innocent questions is still in there somewhere.
“That would be very much appreciated, Mister Caius. I spent the last week in Kalm. How do those people live with only one bar and no underground dance parties? So boring…” She laments lightly.
Umbrella runs her cover over in her mind. It’s one she’s used before. Amy Gutenburg, retired Shinra Lt. Army scout. Now surveyor, bodyguard, and security specialist.
“Midgar. Born and raised, right in the depths of Shinra’s most beautiful pizza in the world.” She taps her pale cheek. “I got the sauce on my cheeks when I was young. That stains, you know?” Wink.
“…Right you don’t know what a Midgar is. Mmm. I could describe the lung-searing smog, the smell of excrement and rust, how the Mako reactors and the city lights make it feel like a living breathing thing…but here.” She pokes at the phone again, rifles through some files, makes sure anything sensitive is in locked mode.
Then she leans up and dangles the phone at Caius. An aerial view first of the massive plate-baring city. A monster of metal and glorious industry. Then a few swipes. Photos of beautiful cars and roads and parks from the upper plate. People, all modern clothes. Things get darker. Slums. Ramshackle buildings, tattooed gangsters and smiling, tired-eyed whores, dirty-faced children with busted and scavenged toys. Umbrella shows both sides.
The Shinra Electric Power Company’s logo is everywhere. No one could mistake who owns Midgar.
“Isn’t it wonderful? Heaven and hell crafted by man’s own ambitions and appetites. The Company did good by me too. Full pension, honorable discharge. Army scout corp.” Nod nod.
He chuckled lightly at her remarks. "Considering you're the only other person not scared of Vordun for a good mile most likely, I don't think there'll be much business in that" He remarked offhandedly, even if he appreciated the attempt at humor at least. The dragon attack on Torensten was a sore spot for Caius, though he had only found out about it recently. It meant there was no way in hell he could take Vordun into town. No matter how friendly Vordun was. So there would certainly be no business in a dragon cruise. He didn't even know if he could utilize Vordun to get the girl wherever she needed to go.
Vordun though, just looked at Umbrella like she had grown a second head. The drake had no idea what she was on about, but it was still better than the usual greeting. The woman stated she was from a place called Midgar. Midgar, Midgar... Hadn't he heard that name before from an offworlder? He wasn't entirely sure and didn't remember enough of the conversation to bother to bring it up, so he just nodded his head. She then brought out the machine and showed him a set of photos of a rather industrial looking city. With a lot of the same logo on it. Couldn't they have had some variety? Sheesh.
"I thought it was a camera" Caius remarked offhandedly. "A little more tiny than what I played with as a kid though" He observed as he looked it over. Once he was finished looking it over though, he nodded his head. "I was thinking Provo might be your scene, but that picture is too high definition for what Provo would be capable of, so I don't think you'd be able to find batteries for it there."
He thought it over a moment longer. "Sonora. Your best bet would be Sonora. Cold, and a little far. But it'll fit your needs. Our best bet would be to fly there on Vordun, would take us half a day that way."
He brushed branches out of the way until the trees finally cleared out and they could see the horizon ahead. "What method of transport we takes up to you. We can Vordun it, or hoof it. One's a half day, the other's... A lot longer. Your call."
