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year 5, quarter 3
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Use your own eyes, and see for yourself which side I'm on.
Her apartment was a splash of color on gray.
What had once been plain white walls were now covered in canvas and immaculately painted landscapes. Her patchy couch had been replaced by several armchairs and a bed with a patterned bedspread. Her cabinets had been painted in swirling designs with ivy and flowers, and an easel stood in one corner with another canvas and a half-finished painting ready to be finished.
Sometime between her meeting with Relm and now, her two room apartment had become a true home.
Celes stepped inside the front room, glancing around for Relm. She liked to go off into town by herself (no matter how Celes warned her -- she had to trust the girl would stay on guard) so Celes wasn’t particularly worried by her absence. Celes herself had been gone for two days already on another mission with the newly formed Dragonblades, and she could hardly blame Relm for entertaining herself in the meantime. With a sigh, Celes cracked her neck, stretching before falling back into an armchair.
Mercenary missions were rewarding when they were done for the common good, but they always left her stiff and sore from the travel, not to mention all the cuts and bruises she hadn’t bothered to heal with magic. What she really needed was a hot bath and a long nap. Despite all her time in Zephon, she still considered a hot shower and a decent bed the most indulgent of luxuries.
Celes glanced over to the easel, pausing as she noticed an almost lifelike human face grinning back at her. The hair wasn’t done and neither were the clothes or the bangles that she clearly planned to fill in. Still, there was something painfully familiar about it, and Celes couldn’t help but squint at it closer trying to make it out. There was something about that expression. Something about those eyes…
Celes gasped, touching at her mouth. Her stomach churned at the familiarity of it all and she felt her throat tighten.
It was Locke.
There was no mistaking that grin, that jawline, the jaunty look in his eye. It was Locke, as clear as the morning sunrise even without his hair or his leather jacket lined in zebra print. Celes slammed her eyes closed and covered her mouth with her hand. It had been so long since she’d seen him.
A painful longing welled in her chest, and she muffled a shuddering breath with her palm. She felt hot tears well in her eyes before they streamed in rivulets down her cheeks. The man who had saved her life even when she hadn’t wanted saving. The man who had joked with her, protected her, believed in her even when she’d turned her back on them all. The man who’d given her hope when she’d fallen to her lowest, and the man who she’d hoped to press close to for as long as she could manage before they were to climb that horrible tower. He was the first and only man she’d ever truly loved, and the breath in her trembled at the sight of him.
How long had it been since she’d seen his face? She couldn’t say, but it had been too long. Longer than she’d ever imagined was possible without death, and she’d had nothing to even remember him by. When she’d woken in this impossible world, she’d somehow lost his bandanna.
”Oh…” the sound escaped her in a low sigh. How had she forgotten him? How had time dulled her own longing? If he were to appear before her now, could she even look him in the eye? She swallowed hard in shame and buried her face in hands.
No, she wouldn’t be worthy of him. She never had been, but now even less. The world had changed and somehow in the scuffle, she'd forgotten all about him.
Her new home echoed back at her in shameful spirals.
Use your own eyes, and see for yourself which side I'm on.
The Dragonblades.
That’s what they were calling themselves, her and Caius. It had a certain kind of ring to it not so different from the Returners. It had been Caius’ idea, of course -- she’d never been one for naming things. But it had a catchiness that she couldn’t deny.
They’d strike like a dragon’s claw and bring order into this lawless and miraculous land. This was a second chance for them both -- a redemption -- and together they intended to make the most of it.
”For this job,” she said, giving Caius a look as they strolled through the streets of the snow-touched mountain town. ”Did you give them your whole spiel? About the might of a dragon and all that? I know you care about our brand, but it’s a little much.” Even as she criticized him, her words were light. Joking, mostly. If she was being honest with herself, she rather liked his little speeches. It reminded her of Edgar or Locke rallying them all together behind a common goal of resistance. Of course, back then, she hadn’t known what to do with that inspiration when it was directed at her former home, but now? She’d do anything to hear their courageous and oh-so-stupid lines again.
But as it stood, Caius was the next best thing.
”You know, I’ve been in these mountains before. It was during the Reignstorm if you were around for it. There was a terrible blizzard and I nearly died in an avalanche after a yeti tried to kill me. I think the weather’s cleared now, but this isn’t a place to be taken lightly.” A cold wind blew past her carrying bits of iced snow and she shivered beneath her armor. For all its ease of movement, her battle gear wasn’t exactly the best for insulation. If the magic in her blood hadn’t already run cold then she might very well have succumbed to hypothermia before long.
”You said we were meeting at an inn? Or was it a tavern?” She looked about at the rustic, wooden buildings with their shuddered windows and frosted roofs. It looked almost like Narshe except nowhere near as oppressive. ”I think I feel good about this mission. We’ll be helping people and not just by fighting off some monster or another. As much as I’d love to slay behemoths all day, it’s a nice change of pace. I hope the potion really works. That sickness sounded...Well. Horrific, if I’m telling the truth.”
Even as the topic darkened, she couldn’t help the lilt in her step. How long had it been since she’d felt so motivated? So at ease? Had she ever felt like this in her life?
”Is that it?” The building in front of them was larger than the rest and homier too, it seemed, with smoke rising up from its twin fireplaces. She couldn’t make out the sign out front beneath the snow, but she thought she recognized the insignia from the papers Caius had brought back. She looked to Caius in affirmation before starting through the door.
The inside smelled of peppermint and ash. The fireplaces crackled with a cheery kind of warmth against the bitter cold outside. Celes wrapped her arms around herself, shivering again as she let the heat wash over her. Leotards were not the best choice for mountain climbing.
Her eyes trailed from the half-full tables to the very full bar. It seemed that everyone wanted to gather here on a day like this, and she couldn’t blame them. She started towards the bar in interest, wondering who exactly they were supposed to meet and how she’d recognize them when they found each other. She supposed that she and Caius would catch eyes, dressed for battle as they were, and they did. Passing by, she caught nearly half a dozen watching her with something between caution and interest. She kept her eyes ahead. She wouldn’t bother with them, and if they were going to wait then she might as well-
Celes stopped. There, between a surly looking man and woman in a waist-clincher, was a face she’d never forget. A face she’d first seen in a cabin in the middle of a blizzard with his hair loose down to his hips and his naked body sprawled across the floor in front of a fire.
”You!” The cry came from her without a thought. She stared at him, gaping until her thoughts caught up to her and she spat out, ”You’re that stuck-up emperor!”
Use your own eyes, and see for yourself which side I'm on.
Caius laughed. He laughed for a long time, hard laughs that nearly doubled him over. Celes stared at him in surprise for a moment before a weak smile crept up on her. He smiled right back, a wide one as he wiped at his eye. Whether the tear came from laughter or pain, she couldn’t say.
”No objections here, Ma'am.”
Celes almost wanted to call him out on his own nerve, but he looked so happy that she couldn’t help it. Somehow, what she’d said had actually gotten through to him. She wasn’t about to complain about that.
"It will have been some time since I've operated with a team. But listening to you talk about your travels makes me miss the Glaives. Perhaps... Perhaps we can do this after all.” He started quiet but quickly straightened, standing as he added, ”No, we’ll pull it off. I know we can.”
Celes blinked her surprise. Even she couldn’t have predicted this strong a reaction. Had she really been so persuasive? For the first time in her life, had she actually said the right things?
”I…” she started and then lost her words again. ”I’m glad.” She tried for a smile, but knew it was weaker than it should be. Why couldn’t she keep this up?
Caius met her eyes. ”Thank you,” he said with such sincerity that Celes felt her cheeks heat again and she glanced away. "For everything. For working with me, and for being there for me."
”I really wasn’t. Not as well as I could have been.”
”And…” He paused in a way that Celes usually only heard in herself. ”I, uh…” Celes glanced to him to see that he’d looked away as well. Was it just the shadows of the campfire or was he blushing…?
Her stomach clenched in realization. Oh no. The moment she’d dreaded with every male partner she’d ever had. The moment when friendship was forced into something awkward and altogether unwanted. She watched in dread as he patched his words together.
He scratched at the side of his head. ”I feel I've grown to rely on you as well. I would want no one else by my side in battle more than you."
Celes bit at her tongue. No no no! Why did it always have to come to this? Why had she ever reached for his hand?
But the rest never came. She stood there, staring at him, waiting for the proclamation to drop like an anvil from unsteady rafters, but it never did. ‘I want you by my side in battle.’ That was all. She couldn’t help but marvel at him, standing there silhouetted in open flames. The man was a minor miracle made flesh.
He looked back at her and blinked. ”Are you cold? Your cheeks are red.”
”Huh?!” Celes jumped at touched at her face. Was she blushing? How long had she been blushing? ”Oh! Oh no, I’m fine! I’m-!”
”I can get us some more firewood and stoke the fires a bit to warm you up if you need it. Please just tell me in future, I don't mind-"
CRACK
Celes stiffened and thrust her hands together before remembering her exhausted magic and reaching for her sword instead. She’d already forgotten her own battered state, about Caius’ fatigue, and her promise to protect them both. "Stay back." Her eyes narrowed at the rustling grass and she took several steps until she stood between it and Caius.
She had no intention of breaking her promise to him.
Use your own eyes, and see for yourself which side I'm on.
”Why?”
It was a potent question and one that Celes didn’t know if she could answer. Why? It was, as Caius said, not to her benefit. No, if Celes had only herself to consider, she’d be best served going back to Provo and pretending this whole affair had never happened. And yet…
”Why would you risk your life for me?"
That was a question she could answer much better.
”It wouldn’t just be for you. That madman is loose and he’ll keep hurting people until he’s stopped. I’ve never been one to let evils go by without consequence.” Her grip shifted in Caius’. It was starting to make her uncomfortable, but she kept it if only for the mere gesture of it all. He needed something to hold onto. It was as simple as that.
”And…” she started again, looking away for the first time. ”You’re a good person. You don’t deserve to throw your life away. I wouldn’t want you to. And I guess I’ve...come to depend on you. I haven’t felt this driven in a long time. I’d gotten used to being alone.” It was all true, but Celes couldn’t help the blush that strengthened at her cheeks. She felt suddenly vulnerable in a way she hadn’t before. It was something she hadn’t admitted even to herself.
”That aside.” Celes cleared her throat and finally pulled her hand away. They’d been touching for too long. Celes cleared her throat. ”I’m not suggesting we go after him alone. With what we just saw, adding me to the equation wouldn’t do much to overpower him. We'll need a team -- as many as we can gather. It would take time, but if we’re serious about ending him then there’s no other choice. We’ll need to warn the world of that man, and take anyone who’s willing to help us defeat him. And who’s skilled enough to not get in the way, of course.” She gave a short noise somewhere between a laugh and sigh. ”It’s just like old times. I feel like I’m traveling the world to go after Kefka again.” Funny how she could say the name now without flinching. When had that happened?
”I know you’re anxious to kill him at once, but this is simply the way it will have to be. Unless you want to take me down with you in your little suicide mission because I’m coming whether you like it or not. And when have you ever been able to talk me out of anything?” Celes straightened, her expression cleared but for a look of sheer confidence. ”Any objections?”
Use your own eyes, and see for yourself which side I'm on.
Caius sighed. It was a reaction at least.
”No. I'm sorry. I could have killed him if I hadn't gotten sloppy. I... I don't..." He stopped and Celes glanced at him awkwardly. The light of the fire cast haunted shadows under his eyes. It made him looks older. Weaker.
"But thank you,” he said after a moment. ”For your words. And... And for staying. You could have left after the job was done, and while I don't understand why you did... I'm glad you're here. I would not be here if not for you."
”What?” Celes blinked. Whatever she’d expected, it hadn’t been that. ”I…” She looked down at her own hands, twisting together in that nervous way of hers. What was she supposed to say?
”Once we're back in town, I'll get our pay, we'll split. And then I need to begin gathering information on his whereabouts.
Celes looked to him in surprise. She shouldn’t have been shocked, of course, not with what had just happened, but she couldn’t help it. Why would he ever want to go after someone so impossible to defeat? Why had she done the same in her own time? There simply wasn’t anything else.
Caius’ eyes never left the fire. His gaze bore into it like he was looking into his own soul. ”I'm going to find him again. And then I'm going to kill him.”
Celes bit her lip. There was something about his voice that she didn’t like. A buried darkness that sent a chill up her spine. ”Caius…”
If he’d heard her, he didn’t make any sign of it. There was only him, the fire, and his own rage. ”I will avenge my family."
Celes winced. These were the words of someone who had lost everything.
”Caius,” she said again, louder this time before hesitating and stepping towards him. She knelt beside him, pausing before reluctantly reaching out to touch his hand. Her cheeks burned, but she didn’t waver again. She needed him to hear her. ”Caius. I know what you’re thinking, but rushing in like that. You saw what he did to us. We couldn’t even scratch him, and if he hadn’t let us live…” A soft breath escaped her, not quite a sigh and not quite a scowl. It was only pained.
”I know what you’re feeling,” she said before shooting him a short look. ”And don’t say I don’t. I’ve...been where you have. Or something like it.” Her voice softened. Had she ever told anyone about her time on the island? If she did, she didn’t remember it.
”When I lost everything,” she said. ”When the world fell to ruin, I...was alone. On an island. And I...Well, it was too painful to live. I didn’t want to.” Her voice was constricted, but wavered nonetheless. Words were more painful than a blade could ever be.
”Even when I left, I devoted myself to fight that god. I told myself I’d at least die trying. Because there was nothing left.” Celes glanced at him. Her grip on his hand tightened. ”But it’s not ruined here. There are people and places and there’s time. You’re not alone, Caius. I’m not saying we should let him go, but doing it alone...You might as well just die now and what's the use in that?” Celes swallowed and straightened herself, even as her throat revolted against a faint sense of nausea. She was glad her grip on Caius’ hand would keep her fingers from trembling.
”If you’re going then I’ll be going with you. And don’t try to stop me. I’m experienced in gathering teams to go on suicide missions, believe it or not. I think I did quite good last time, all things considered.” She looked at him head on in a way that would have made her nervous if there hadn’t been greater things on her mind. ”You’re not alone,” she said again. ”We’ll do it together.”
Use your own eyes, and see for yourself which side I'm on.
Prompto did not shoot it, but Caius did. Or more accurately, he flipped, slashed, and shot it all at once in that peculiar, flashy way of his that always made Celes think he must be showing off. But it was effective, and bits of its flesh were peeled away like fruit beneath a paring knife. The flesh burned as it parted ways with its host, and Celes gagged at the husky, solid scent that hit her in waves. The thing was screaming in low, animal noises and Celes had to stop herself from shoving her hands over her ears too. All that kept her focus was the pain in her arm and the possibility that Caius might need her help.
He didn’t, of course. The thing was an inferior copy of him without any kind of strategy or cunning, but she stood by for support nonetheless. Finally, he shoved his sword straight through its center (’Wouldn’t that be the path of most resistance?’ she wondered, but it seemed effective) and a gush of blood shot out of it towards Caius in like a magiteck cannon. Celes stared at in shock, blinking, as the hellish doppleganger melted down to bones and then oozed across the ground back to the altar.
”Well,” Celes said as silence finally filled the air again. ”That was...something.” She touched at her arm, glancing at the blood that returned on her finger. The cut was long but not deep. She wouldn’t need much to heal it.
”Oh, what’s it doing now?” Celes shot the altar a long-suffering look as it gave off rusted mechanical noises on creaking hinges. Finally, it began to lower, revealing what she thought at first to be another pit until the top of the altar stopped about four feet in, leaving behind nothing but a smooth, rectangular hole.
The walls rumbled.
Celes tensed, breath cold as she turned to face them. Her eyes widened and she took a step back. The wall in front of her was moving. It scraped towards them like a grip-vice, and as Celes whipped around to make distance, she saw the other one closing in as well. Her breath quickened. Why was it so hard to breathe?
”No, no, no! Oh no!” She barely heard her own cries as she looked around desperately for escape. There was the hole, of course, but it was far too small to fit them all, and even then, what were they to do but suffocate? Then there was the trap door above them, but she could barely see it in the darkness. There had to be something, there just had to be or-!
Or they’d die. Was this where she died?
”Ideas, guys, ideas!” Prompto sounded as panicked as she felt. He pointed up towards the ceiling. ”We gotta get up there, pronto! Celes was right — we need to get back out by that way!"
”WAS I?” Celes’ voice was a shrill screech scraping over rumbling stone. ”WAS I RIGHT? WHO COULD HAVE GUESSED THAT?” The walls were moving too quickly. Too loudly. She already felt caged in like a pacing animal. ”Oh will you give me time to THINK?” She thrust her hands together and muttered the fastest spell of her life, finishing in a frantic cry of ”Stop!” The wall in front of her froze, stopping in time like a frozen photograph. It wouldn’t last long and the other wall crept in on them all the same.
”Caius, go! I’ll try to hold it off!” She whipped around on her heel and started the spell towards the second wall, fully aware that the other was teetering on the verge of movement again. ”Stop!”
Use your own eyes, and see for yourself which side I'm on.
Celes didn’t know what to say.
More had happened in one night than Celes had seen in her entire time in this strange new world, and she was still processing it, still sorting out whatever emotions had flared in that cave. She wasn’t proud of them. In hindsight, she should have shown more sympathy. She should have helped Caius more, but she’d been overwhelmed. Her skepticism had blared at full blast just as a coping mechanism for the sheer amount of events she’d witnessed, and her confusion had led to frustration. She shouldn’t have shouted the things she had. She shouldn’t have judged Caius so harshly. She shouldn’t have been anything but supportive for the simple fact that none of it had really been about her.
And so as they both emerged from that cave after a great deal of rock-climbing aided by the last of her magic, her frustration had melted into shame. Was she really so terrible of a person?
”Caius,” she started as they started into the night, and then she stopped. What was there to say after something like that? The trauma showed clearly on his face. He was exhausted, pained, and defeated. There was nothing else. ”I don’t think you’ll get your sword back tonight. I doubt there will be any monsters on the way back to town that I can’t handle. Rest for now, and maybe you’ll feel better in the morning.”
As if he didn’t know that! Celes bit her tongue at her own stupidity. What else was there? An apology for one. Maybe a show of empathy, but she was afraid of making it all worse. Her tongue couldn’t exactly be trusted at the moment.
Still, it felt wrong to leave it at that. In the chill of the night, she shivered as a wind passed by them. All around them, tall grassed stretched into an infinite horizon. Celes felt swallowed by the space.
”I…” she tried again and then swallowed. Her tongue was dry. ”I’m sorry. For what happened back there. You were clearly distressed, and I…”Did nothing. The words caught in her throat but she thought he’d understand. He had to. ”I hope that you feel better. I really do.”
Use your own eyes, and see for yourself which side I'm on.
Caius did well -- Of course he did, it was Caius -- while Prompto kept up his barrage of bullets in a suppressing fire that made the thing screech. Celes stood her ground, waiting for the right moment to strike when she would least hinder Caius’ sword. It was then that the undead doppelganger spotted Prompto. She saw the look in its eyes, saw it dodge around Caius, and rush towards Prompto, and she was moving without a thought. She stood at mid-length, closer to Prompto than Caius was, but it was fast. Almost as fast as Caius himself.
”Guys, a little help here?” Prompto’s voice was high with panic as the thing thrust its sword, but Celes was already close at hand. She charged forward, catching the blade a few inches from Prompto’s shoulder and shoving it back roughly. The thing reacted quickly, slashing at her in a skilled barrage of blows that she could hardly keep up with. That was Caius’ style, alright. Fast and so close ranged she could smell the thing’s dreadful, rotting scent.
”Shoot it!” she cried out to Prompto. He was close ranged and armed. There wasn’t a single possibility he might miss. ”I can’t keep it off much long-!” Before she could finish the sentence, she saw his sword move faster than she could react, and she threw herself to the side -- a bad choice she realized a millisecond too late as she ran bodily into Prompto. Her boots stumbled over themselves as Caius’ gunblade whistled past her head and sliced straight down the back of her upper arm. She winced and twisted herself around to face it, sword raised defensively.
Use your own eyes, and see for yourself which side I'm on.
”Okay, understood!” Relm said before shuffling her feet, a mischievous gleam in her eye. ”You know Celes, you could pass for my mom... No my big sister at this rate! Our physical traits are even mostly the same, no one could tell!”
”I...What?” Celes blinked at her in shock, but she’d already winked and slipped away into the crowd. Celes was left staring after her, gaping.
Her mother? Did it really look like…?
No. Obviously not. Celes was only nineteen after all, and Relm had to be nearing twelve, but an older sister? Her cheeks heated at the thought. She’d never had a family before. She wouldn’t even know where to start with what sisterhood even meant, and yet…
She couldn’t say she hated the idea.
While Relm was gone, Celes took her place against a nearby wall, arms crossed and shoulders set against it. She tried to keep her eyes sharp for the girl, but Relm just wasn’t tall enough to stick out above the crowd, and Celes had to remind herself that Relm was strong. Relm was capable. And if anyone tried to hurt her, they’d face Relm’s wrath before Celes’.
It didn’t take overly long for Relm to return as though she’d merely popped from the ground, eyes bright and gleaming. She handed over Celes’ money and her stomach sunk at the lightness of it all. Were art supplies really that expensive?
"Thank you Celes! That was all I needed! What's your apartment like?"
Celes was a little taken aback by Relm’s excitement and childish lack of focus. Still, she tried to steady herself quickly. She wasn’t one to “roll with the social punches.” Not nearly as well as she rolled with physical ones at least.
”Well. It’s small, first off. So be ready for that. And I haven’t really decorated yet. It’s mostly just been a place to stay since I seem to be sticking around. I don’t make much money doing what I do, so it’s all I can afford right now. It’s more than most in my position can afford.”Because of Caius. It all came back to him, didn’t it? The jobs, the flow of money, the reason to stick around in the first place. They didn’t have a single spark of chemistry, and yet…
She shook her head. Had it been so long since she’d had allies without any other strings attached?
”Let’s get going then. I’ll take the couch until I can get us another bed. And we’ll need to get your painting set up. I should have a few days until my next job. Unless Caius shows up with another request, but we’ll deal with that when we get there.” Celes started off down the street, eyeing the sky thoughtfully. Running into something familiar...It was an odd experience every time. It was like meshing together dreams and reality until she couldn’t tell the difference.
With Relm walking beside her, Celes was struck by an odd feeling that she couldn’t quite identify. A big sister. Was that what she’d become?
Either way, she had more to care for now than just herself. And she didn’t exactly hate that idea either.
Use your own eyes, and see for yourself which side I'm on.
They didn’t think that they could get back out the trap door -- both of them agreed, but that only meant they’d have to be more resourceful than the obvious solution. If Caius couldn’t use his sword trick (warping as Prompto called it) then they’d just have to find something else. ”Well. Fine. But maybe we could use some other magic? I know a few spells that could help. Maybe if I burned the door away? Though no. That might set the whole house on fire. There has to be something because really, who would possibly be stupid enough to-?”
The torches went out.
Not again! Celes tensed in the darkness, grabbing at the hilt of her sword in case anything came out of the sheer black curtains around her. Not again, no not this! She could’t let down her guard even to light a fire spell to see by. No, she would have to play it by ear -- listening and waiting and what was that light on the altar?
The lights returned, casting the scene in deep red. At first, Celes thought it must have been the light that altered the scene before her, but no. That was blood. Sheer, pooling blood that coated the thing and ran off it in streams, soaking Caius’ boots as he stood beside it. It gathered before them and then began to form into something unnatural, hideous, and disturbingly familiar all in one.
”What did you do?” It came in a horrified whisper as Celes touched at her mouth. The thing that took shape in front of her looked like Caius but wrong somehow like it was made of dead things left to rot in the dark. It held a sword loose in one hand and charged at them in a morbid mockery of Caius’ style.
Celes let out a yelp and jumped back rather than deal with that thing head on. No, she didn’t want to look at it. She didn’t want to think about it and she certainly didn’t want to get close enough to smell it or hear its ragged breaths. As Prompto’s gunshots fired off beside her, Celes decided that Caius was mostly likely to keep it busy on the front lines regardless. That meant they’d need to provide aid, and that was something both Celes and Prompto seemed more than willing to do.
”Protect!” Celes voice wavered as she hurled the spell Caius’ way. She couldn’t cast anything offensive with the two thrown so closely together, but she could at least give him an edge. ”Haste!” she cast again once her incantations were complete. She cast her fevered mind for anything else that might be helpful before cursing to herself under her breath and pulling at her sword.
”Oh, that's enough!” She edged closer, waiting for her chance to either kill the thing while it was distracted or swoop in if Caius found himself overwhelmed. Then again, maybe he’d handle it on his own without any need for her. One could hope.
